By now, most stadiums have some sort of service that allows you to text an issue to a number for in-stadium assistance. Intended uses? Reporting crimes, fights, overly drunk fans, etc. In Philly it's probably specifically good for contacting authorities when degenerates intentionally vomit on children.
Unintended uses? Making jokes.
Back in October there was an account on WFNY of a fan who used Browns Stadium's texting service to make a joke and the stick-up-the-ass response he got from the Browns. Personally, I thought it was pretty funny.
I decided to send a report to the Browns today, regarding misconduct;
“There’s a guy who keeps going on the field who shouldn’t be there. Please remove him. He can be identified by the large number 3 on his jersey.”
The Browns were not amused. Three minutes later, I got the following;
“The GuestAssist service is provided to ensure a safe environment for all guests. Continued misuse of the service may result in your mobile phone being blocked.”
Flash forward to last Thursday in Philadelphia. I was at Citizen's Bank Park to catch the Tribe/Phillies afternoon tilt while on vacation. (Jay from Let's Go Tribe, a proud Clevo transplant who now calls Philly home, was there, too. Thanks again to him for hanging out that afternoon.)
Anyway, if you don't remember that game, not that there is any reason to, here's the short version: It was a miserable start by Fausto and a miserable afternoon in general as the Tribe sucked in their usual, varied ways en route to a 12-3 loss in the middle of 95-degree heat. Yeah, easy to get distracted during a game like that.
As Fausto floundered away early on, a friend of mine noticed the text help number at the park and decided to send a query.
"the indians don't have a long reliever today. location: visitor's bullpen."
And the response... 100% nicer than the Browns'. Probably because the Phillies guy/gal had pity on us.
"Thank you for pointing that out. Enjoy the game."
Follow me on Twitter: @vincethepolack.
Buzz Bissinger — the respected sports author whose work includes Friday Night Lights, which inspired the movie and TV show — has given a mixed review to the LeBron autobiography Shooting Stars, which Bissinger co-wrote with Akron’s favorite son.
In a New Republic piece posted Monday, Bissinger explains, “Shooting Stars was far from the best book I had ever written; the compromises of such collaboration, written in the first person of James and subject to his approval, had always shamed me. I did it for the money, because all writers, or at least those who don’t want to die, also have to eat. But I also did it because it was an inspirational coming-of-age story involving LeBron and the four teammates who had become his brothers through high school.” — D.X. Ferris
The LeBron free agency drama has presented some money making opportunities. It's like wartime profiteering, but without the war. Everyone's making money, stands to make money, wants to make money, or is scheming to make money off LeBron.
Consider the owner of LeBronSucks.com. Some smarty bought up the domain, has held onto it without creating a real site, and is now offering the memorable, very direct domain on eBay for the low, low price of $9,999.
Here's the sell job:
Short and very recognizable domain name. Receives hits daily without SEO or paid placement. He will be the top free agent of all time in two weeks - pick up this domain name now in preparation of capitalizing on the current and future traffic.
So there you go. If you hate LeBron and love traffic, this is your go-to guy.
When informed that the Lake Erie Crushers were the lead on SportsCenter for their LeBron-themed plans for the June 30 game ($1600/month contract, Cavs jerseys, etc.), here's what manager John Massarelli had to say:
“We were the lead for SportsCenter for that?” Massarelli said. “I thought it was because we won five of our last six.”
Seriously, nice for the Crushers to make SportsCenter.
One underrated detail
It seems like forever ago now that the news of a partnership between the Cavs and a Chinese investment group broke. Synergy at its finest would be one way to describe it. As the NBA strives to expand its presence in the Asian market, the Cavs, with the biggest superstar on the planet, were a natural fit. The Cavs struck a sponsorship deal with Tsingtao, too, creating synergistic synergy, or something.
But the deal still isn't done. The deal was supposed to allow Albert Hung and his investors to grab up to a 15% ownership stake in the Cavs, essentially buying out David Katzman's share. It could be worth up to $70 million, but nothing has been officially presented to the NBA as of yet.
Why? Well, LeBron, of course. Why would the Chinese investment group consent to anything official, to any official dollar amount, until LeBron's fate is known?
Our marketing and business relationship efforts with the Chinese continue to grow, evidenced by our Tsingtao Beer relationship and others that we are exploring,” Komoroski said.
The uncertainty hovering over the minority investment deal comes as owner Dan Gilbert tries to keep star LeBron James in Cleveland. Keeping James would be a big asset to the Chinese investment group looking to market the NBA in China. James becomes a free agent July 1.
“The Cavs’ profile has increased markedly in China so much so that the largest brewery in China became a multiyear, multimillion-dollar sponsor of the Cavs,” said Marc Ganis, president of SportsCorp Ltd., which helped broker the Cavs’ Tsingtao sponsorship deal.
If you bought a box of Frosted Flakes in 1994, you might have gotten this in the box: A sheet of MLB temporary tattoos.
Of course, the designs are kid-friendly, which means they're awesomely cartoonish and unlike most of the regular MLB logos. Take the Tribe's, for example. Why on earth is the guy holding a hammer? Why does he have a mustache? Is it an ode to our blue collar town? Probably. It's mainly just awesome though. I'd rock one of those right now.
Follow me on Twitter: @vincethepolack.
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