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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Bud Shaw Claims Heat More Evil Than Yankees, Receives Swift Mocking from Miami

Posted By on Tue, Jul 27, 2010 at 11:30 AM

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Bud Shaw thinks the Miami Heat are more evil than the New York Yankees. He also believes that tofu is more delicious than pork. He is wrong on both accounts. It doesn't even merit a thoughtful or reasoned response since everyone, except Bud Shaw that is, can agree that the Yankees are infinitely more evil than the Heat.

Instead, we'll just point you toward the Miami New Times' take down of the article, written by one Gus Garcia-Roberts. Gus just happened to be a Scene staffer for a couple years before sojourning to Miami in search of a sun and fun. For the record, the Miami New Times is more evil than Scene.

Anyway, Gus has just the right response for Bud:

What Bud said: "What it did in effect was take the late George Steinbrenner's team-stacking recipe and spice it with pure conceit."

What Bud Means: Holding a celebration for fans after the team secured three of the best players in the NBA [eds. note: while keeping the payroll to the same level as every other team in the league] was really mean. Even more mean than that baseball team from New York [eds. note: which has a payroll currently $70 million higher than the next-most expensive team in the MLB] that always absconded with our good players because our general manager practices a bootleg version of Moneyball.

Uh... George Steinbrenner! Web hits!

What Bud said: "There was James, who cashed his chips here with the Boston series still in progress, predicting the Heat would win multiple titles. Six, seven, eight. He couldn't decide."

What Bud means: I haven't eaten solid foods in three weeks. Is it possible to die from bitterness?

What Bud said: "Miami is the new SuperTeam in sports, which might be good for NBA ratings and road attendance but not much else." ... "James, Wade and Bosh together is good for them, good for the Heat and terrible for the league."

What Bud means: Let's face it: It's bad for me... and my poodle Darlene, who I only feed on days that a Cleveland sports team wins, because I am a bitter, bitter, man.

Make sure you read the whole thing, if just to find out what happens to Darlene.

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