This is a joke, dudes. Can some of you not see that??
This was good. I admit that I'm lunkheaded enough on a Friday afternoon to not get it at first. But, hang on, I finally caught up with ya. I'd like to see more of this, just to keep the ol' neurons sharp.
This is the stupidest thing I have ever read. It is not remotely funny.
Brilliantly written, Z! I'm glad the real Loogie's have taken the time to enlighten us all with their comments.
You all obviously are too thick headed to realize this was a satirical piece. If you actually thought this was real then you shouldn't be using the internet.
Beachland Is awesome...... this guy is an ass......
So you light the place on fire after they told you not to use pyrotechnics and they are the bad guys? And on a side note, you're using pyrotechnics in a small venue, you deserve being called an idiot. You're not big time, when you play a gig at the Q or whatever they are calling Nautica these days then you can complain about being shut down. Till then get off your vanity train and realize that your shit does in fact stink just like the rest of us.
Almost reads like gonza journalism!!!!!
Disappointed this wasn't in the print edition but great article!
At times you never know whats a joke.. Have you met some of the human race giggles.
Do you people seriously not realize that this "open letter" is a joke? Are these angry responses for real?! Lol
Hats off to the satire boys. I completely missed the "more comedy" link. I never underestimate the potential idiocy of humans. I have known and associated with people that act just like "Loogie".....very believable. I just hope everyone else catches it eventually too. The safe and the professional have been fighting this fight for awhile.....but the fight isn't with the venues of course. I'd love to know what the cause/inspiration behind this article was.....
Satire you guys. Satire.
First off The Beachland Ballroom has been a staple of rock in Cleveland, The owners & staff run their selfs down to the grown working hard for every single person that books that venue. The stage is low and the curtains and the wood built of the venue are not fitting for a show of that type. You have in proximity to the audience that will be dangerous, Second of all you should send all your specs to your booking manager (If you are a touring band you should have those in set as well as all pieces of gear in the stage for the sound man to be ready in advance) but you have only been rocking asses for 3 months right.. Do you know what the word writer is? As Band Manager is your job to make sure that the venue has what your band needs. Its not the venues job to tell you what you need. That will be in your tech section of your contract (rider)
Cleveland Fire requires a permit for said performances and a fire watch (A firemen present) To make sure nothing goes wrong and if it does they can go ahead and fix it quickly. You do not have a certificate on your wall either if you just know a volunteer firemen that is not telling you what you need to know.
Fire laws are different every where (township based) It's your job to make sure you do everything to keep your band and your fans safe, You want to be treated like a rock star and you have not even earned that status. I have been working with the beachland for 5 years and its my home venue they have been more the fulling in every single request and have accommodated me and my shows to a great degree.
You talking about my home town and let alone my family (venue) is offensive, Crews like Infusion cary their own techs and do alot of the work based on safety their selfs. They would never put any one in danger and never have. I know because i have seen them.
You are just a clueless want to be rock head that has no brain or smarts into the order of professional touring and stage managing.
Bands like KISS, Rammstien & AC/DC carry logistics managers and they coordinate the Pyro technicians as well as stage crew and also make sure every thing has a test run before it goes out on tour Internationally. There is thousands of dollars that it takes to make sure you ensure the safety of the venue.. Also Fire Insurance !! So if you burn down venues and kill people you just gonna be like sorry yo! rock and roll!!
Really You really need need need a high school diploma and a good chemistry class!
If you think pyrotechnics are that big of a deal for some no name band, you are clearly overcompensating. Especially for not-as-big bands, it's more about the music. And as the person previous mentioned, there are other alternatives to add to your stage show. And I'm glad dumbass knowitalls aren't able to go playing with explosives they aren't licensed to use.
Wow. The complete lack of safety and brains. I'm astonished. People like this guy are the exact reason why my performance group and others like it have such a hard time being allowed to perform in the city of Cleveland. We have MANUAL sparks and it's still an issue. There is a HUGE difference between what we do and pyrotechnics.... but people are scared because of crap like this and great white. The ceilings in the Beachland are not low. Infusion has performed with much lower ceilings and never caused a fire. Him and his fire fighter brother know nothing and I can tell you this from experiencing our constant battle against the Cleveland fire department. I won't bore you with the details, but he ia very wrong. Oh....and Rammstein plays in GIANT arenas.....and they have pyrotechnicians on site. You do in fact need a license to display pyrotechnics.
I would respectfully disagree with Bridget's assessment of how his players feel. Having had two sons play for this gentleman I would replace "feared" with "loved." He is a rarity.
I DISAGREE WITH YOU!
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