With a steady cast of gorgeous dancers and a long list of temporary attractions — they've hosted porn star Emily Austin and "world famous" Chelsea Charms (the proud owner of "the world's biggest augmented breasts") so far in April — Scene readers chose Christie's as the best place to go for naked women and alcohol. The club in the Flats boasts it's "the finest east of the Mississippi River," highlighting their "VIP Champagne Suites" with fireplaces, plasma TVs, karaoke and XBox systems (because people love playing video games at strip clubs). For the gentleman who desires a little female company, for the bachelor party sect and for the out-of-towners who can't stand one more night in an empty, lonely hotel room, Christie's is the high-class strip joint that'll make you feel at home (and other things.)
1180 Main Ave., 216-574-6222, christiescabaret.com.
Staff Pick: Diamond's