It’s Scene’s Lust survey on sex & romance. Grab a towel and join the fun

Bring on the Nasty 

It’s Scene’s Lust survey on sex & romance. Grab a towel and join the fun

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What was your most embarrassing sexual moment?

• Caught in the act by my mother.

• Cutting my foot on the bedframe while changing positions.

• There have been multiple times throughout college that I've

had to stop mid-bang and deal with hangover-related issues.

• Getting caught mid-act in the Metroparks.

• Got a nosebleed during oral sex. I thought it was her period. She was

still laughing when I came back from the bathroom with a Kleenex.

• Once I was dating this girl who lived in PA. She was what most people

call a "squirter." Let's just say I didn't throw my clothes far enough

away and ended up driving the two hours home in a soaking wet T-shirt.

• Sharting while laying in bed naked having romantic

conversation post-sex.

What local public servant is actually

pretty hot when you squint just right? And given 10 minutes alone in that

servant's chambers, what would you do?

• I can't squint that hard.

• Public servant and "hot" don't go

together. Ever.

Ed FitzGerald: I'd do the same I

do for my boyfriend — make his eyes roll

to the back of his head.

• Judge Joan Synenberg: I'd spread

her legs and eat her for lunch.

• Jimmy Dimora: I'd

bribe the shit out of him.

• Maureen Harper, Chief of

Communications for City of

Cleveland: I'd do things that

are only legal in Mexico.

• I love Dennis Kucinich

for his brain: I'd discuss our radical liberalisms for 8 minutes but then before we can do anything else his tall wife comes and forces me out and they

get down to business instead.

• Former WDOK DJ Nancy Alden: I'd strap her

down on the bed and taste her pussy.

• The nude torso on the Justice center:

I would give her head. Natch.

What famous Clevelander would

you most like to bang and why?

TOP ANSWERS:

Halle Berry and Michael Symon

Other responses:

• Allie LaForce, because she is an up-and-comer.

• Betsy Kling ... those dimples and that ass get me every time.

• Coach Shurmur ... maybe it

will improve the team.

• James Marsden (his grandma

lives here so I think he counts).

• Josh Cribbs: I like a gentleman that didn't

dis Cleveland.

• LeBron ... I think it would be cool to reenact that scene from Pulp Fiction ... you know the one.

• Lee Jordan. Been wanting to hit that for a long time.

• Tracy McCool from Fox 8 is way hotter in

person than you'd expect.

• Patricia Heaton. I'd eat that like it was a bowl of ice cream.

• Pre-pregnant Sharon Reed. Never had a black chick.

Best Cleveland-area locale where you can't legally have sex but you did anyway.

• Bathroom at Flannery's Pub.

• Behind the Free Stamp.

• Christie's.

• Edgewater Park.

• Huntington Beach.

• Is this entrapment? It sort of feels like entrapment.

• Johnny's restroom.

• Mentor Headlands.

• The Metroparks.

• Nautica Stage at 3 in the morning.

• Parking garage at East Ninth, waiting for traffic to clear out.

• Reptile house at the zoo.

• The Rock Hall.

• The CWRU football field, but watch out for turf burns.

• Tower City Amphitheater, in the middle of a show, on the edge

of a mosh pit during a Flogging Molly concert. She had a skirt

and platform boots. Score.

• Wendy Park.

What's the strangest place you've ever had sex?

• A chapel in a dorm at the University of Dayton.

• A city street fair.

• At school behind a vending machine.

• Boss's office.

• Does a handjob while sitting at the bar and talking to the bartender at the old House of Cues count?

• In the back of an ambulance.

• In the butt — ha-ha, Newlywed Game flashback!

• On my neighbor's roof. Not that great, believe it or not.

• On the observation deck at Perry's Monument on Put-in-Bay.

Quick doggy style interrupted by elevator opening and people

entering the observation area.

• On the shore of Lake Erie in late February — very cold.

Conceived my first child.

• The bathroom of the House of Swing.

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