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Pigskin Pitchman; Conflicted College; The Bus Stops Here

Brown-for-a-day Chris Spielman and wife Stefanie appear in advertisements promoting University Hospitals' Ireland Cancer Center. The former Massillon and Ohio State star, you may remember, took a year off from the NFL to be with his family as Stefanie battled breast cancer.

If the ads lead you to believe University Hospitals treated Stefanie, you'd be mistaken. She received care at the James Cancer Hospital in Columbus. UH spokeswoman Eileen Korey says the Spielmans have a relationship with the Ireland center through its National Cancer Institute designation. "The Spielmans have been interested in conveying the message that, if you receive cancer care, you should do it at an NCI care hospital," she says. Ireland and the James are the only two Ohio hospitals to be endorsed by the NCI.

Oberlin College is so P.C., it uses only free-range ketchup in dorm cafeterias. Administrators stridently refuse to do business with companies that use sweatshop labor. So there's a bit of irony in Larry Dolan's recent appointment to the college's board of trustees. Dolan, of course, is the owner of the Indians, which sport America's ultimate un-P.C. mascot. When students discover where all those Chief Wahoo hats and jerseys are made, let the protests begin.

Reason No. 281 not to vote: Worried the Superstation's James Bond marathon wouldn't have concluded by November 7, the Edge sent away for an absentee ballot. Little did we know, absentee-ballot requests are public record. Now we return home to a mailbox crammed with crud from every candidate with an account at Kinko's. If we wanted this kind of attention, we would have called the 1-800 number of that "multilevel marketing club" our uncle recommended.

EcoCity Cleveland ripped malls in a recent newsletter for not figuring bus traffic into their designs. At SouthPark Center in Strongsville, for instance, transit riders are dropped off on busy Rt. 82 because the mall didn't provide a bus inlet. Riders have an impressive hike to reach the front door.

RTA's Jerry Masek says malls are private property, so the transit authority needs their permission to create stops. "We have a standard offer to work with any mall at any time," he says. But SouthPark shows little interest in being peasant-friendly. The mall didn't return repeated phone calls.

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