It starts with three guys with names like Diamond, Apollo, and Ozmosis, who perform a Village People-inspired "fantasy dance." Those are the words of Gerry Keating, master of ceremonies at the Grid/Orbit's Dick Daze. "They come out as a policeman or as a baseball player or as a cop or as a fireman or whatever and do a strip. And then they strip down to their G-strings and do the Dick Walk."
Yes, the Dick Walk. It happens every Thursday night: Two dancers mingle with the audience for tips, while the third slips into a shadowbox for some dirty dancing behind a sheer silk curtain . . . wearing nothing but a smile.
Customers, two by two, can jump behind the screen for some creative fun with glow paint. "We'll have two guys behind the screen painting [the stripper] while he's naked," Keating says. "And hopefully, he has a hard-on." Order up a stiff one, and get ready for Dick Daze at 10:30 p.m. and midnight Thursday at Grid/Orbit, 1437 St. Clair Avenue. Admission is free. Call 216-623-0113 if you really need more information. -- Cris Glaser
Fat Possum hits the road.
BY SAT 3/6
The four guys at the center of the Fat Possum Juke Joint Caravan have paid their dues and have every right to sing the blues. T-Model Ford, Paul "Wine" Jones, Kenny Brown, and Cedric Burnside have operated outside the industry for most of their lives. The aging bluesmen are Mississippi music institutions -- folk artists determined to keep field hollers and recordings alive via modern studio techniques. But don't let the laid-back, front-porch quality of their records fool you; these howlin' wolves stalk a stage with youthful force. This is dirty, rustic music, amped and just a little bit nostalgic for a time when a guitar, a few traditional tunes, and an audience were all a man needed to make a living. The tour rolls into town at 9 p.m. Saturday at the Beachland Ballroom, 15711 Waterloo Road. Tickets are $10; call 216-383-1124. -- Michael Gallucci
Black Is Back
Akron's Black Keys get off the road and onstage.
It's a homecoming this weekend for the Black Keys, who return to Akron for a pair of shows at the Lime Spider. The garage-blues duo has been busy since releasing their high-profile CD, Thickfreakness, almost a year ago. Constant touring -- including an opening gig on Beck's tour last summer -- and numerous media accolades have kept Dan Auerbach and Patrick Carney in the spotlight. They play at 9 p.m. Friday and Saturday; the Lime Spider's at 207 South Main Street in Akron. Openers are Intelligent Knives on Friday night and Glenn Schwartz and the Schwartz Brothers on Saturday. Tickets are $10, available by calling 866-468-3401. -- Michael Gallucci
The California that the Elected sings about is similar to the sunny one heralded by the transplanted Irishmen the Thrills. But on its debut album, Me First, the L.A. quartet -- led by Rilo Kiley frontman Blake Sennett -- finds the desolation lurking beneath the shiny facade. They're at the Grog Shop (2785 Euclid Heights Boulevard in Cleveland Heights) at 9 p.m. Wednesday. Tickets are $10 ($8 in advance); call 216-241-5555. -- Michael Gallucci