If while visiting the Warehouse District this weekend, you notice any faux-hawked hipsters walking around with no shirts, a $50 dollar bill in their hand, and a confused look on their faces, don’t be alarmed: Clothing Brigade’s
downtown branch has closed. ...
Yes, it’s true, the designer boutique and winner of the “Best $50 T-Shirts”
category in our 2007 Best of Cleveland issue has folded. Perhaps its demise is due to the fact that, well, $50 is a lot for a t-shirt, even a cool one, and especially in a city where roughly 157 people (professional athletes + Frank Jackson’s relatives) are gainfully employed.
The store has shipped its stock to the Coventry location (1785 Coventry Rd., Cleveland Heights, 216.932.0700), if you’re still dying for an artfully splotched T-shirt. In related news, Salvation Army has asked us to remind readers that all of their local branches remain open, and many of their pre-stretched, 3XL t-shirts also feature splotches, not to mention drawings of shocked cows alongside the caption “Hamburgers are made of WHAT?!” And, they add, they only cost $2.67.
As for the empty West Ninth Street storefront, that brings up a concern for Warehouse District residents: please, Cleveland, don’t put in anything along the lines of a Japanese iced yogurt chain, or a designer necktie boutique, or a $48.50 T-shirt store. If you’ve ever tried to buy a carton of eggs downtown after 10, you know how impractically stocked this neighborhood is. The space is too small for a Giant Eagle, granted. But how about just a little deli run by Armenians who keep the grainy counter-top TV constantly set to Nicholas Cage movies, sell toilet paper for a dollar, tiny bags of Cheetos for 25 cents, and 40 oz. Crazy Horses for $1.99?
Here’s a rule of thumb, friendly developers: if it’s not the type of place that could conceivably sell Vanilla-flavored Dutch Master cigars, please don’t build it. -- Gus Garcia-Roberts