The Iron Maidens, Cleveland’s female rugby team, showed why they were last year’s national finalists by winning the first two games of the season against Akron and Rochester.
The stormy conditions on Saturday made the game resemble a mud-wrestling match. The ball was as slippery as a sea creature and the girls clobbered each other like WWE stars (“That bitch took out my leg,” complained one Maiden after emerging from a pile with a jagged claw scratches across her legs)…
“My father’s a wrestling coach, so he figured if I wasn’t a wrestler, this would have to be the next best thing,” another said.
But the fun didn’t really begin until the teams arrived at The Kenilworth in Lakewood for post-game drinking. The girls started pounding the table in preparation for the night’s sing-off, a rugby tradition. The tawdry lyrics, sung in drunk, off-key notes, went something like this:
“Monday is a working day/
A working day/
Tuesday is a hmm day/
A hmm day/
Wednesday is a dancing day/
A dancing day/
Thursday is a practice day/
A practice day/
Friday is a fucking day/
A fucking day/
Saturday is game day/
The rest of the patrons, there to watch the college basketball playoffs, looked miffed and a bit appalled at the sight of twenty-some year olds singing bad words. A father, escorting his toddler to the bathroom, merely shook his head. But at least one table of yuppie guys were amused by the whole thing.
“I think I like Friday the best,” one guy in an Indians hat deadpanned. – Rebecca Meiser