We want to hate Brendan Haywood, we do. But when you think about it, dude got us some cheap-ass pizzas. Quite the dilemma.
Hey, remember last week, when the Cavs were playing some team full of crazy assholes, and Soulja Boy was there, and some guy with an unpronounceable name smacked Lebron, and somebody called him a crybaby, and then Lebron exploded into a Jordanesque beacon of shock and awe that destroyed Round 1 forever?
Yeah, us neither. But as the Cavs move on to destroy the hopes and dreams of another city — one where the sports fans are so stupid they burn the place down when they do well
— we just found out that there remains some unfinished business from Round 1. And it’s up to the regular people of Northeast Ohio to take care of it, and it’s certainly a task we can handle: eating impossibly cheap pizza. ...
As the legend goes
, during the series, Washington-area Papa John’s pizza shops gave away T-shirts with the word “Crybaby” emblazoned under the number “23.” It was a reference to Brendan Haywood calling LeBron a “crybaby” for complaining about a hard foul. Northeast Ohioans, who always have their priorities straight, vowed to boycott Papa John’s. So the pizza chain has quickly backtracked and offered a promotion: on Thursday, all stores in Northeast Ohio will offer large one-topping pies for 23 cents. Get it, like Lebron’s number? Now if only the pizza didn’t taste like cardboard, and its famed garlic dipping sauce like melted hair pomade. -- Gus Garcia-Roberts