Your guide to thriving in fabulous Cleveland.
Nicked at Night: Convicted Cuyahoga County corruption all-stars serving time in a West Virginia prison have found a humbling new outlet for their skills: exchanging packs of tuna for first dibs on the TV remote. Sadly, and hilariously, this is not a joke.
County Fashion Reforms: New dress code for Cuyahoga County office workers forbids shorts, mini-skirts, and other skimpy attire. Implicitly banned: zebra-striped shirts buttoned only halfway.
Like Fucking De Niro: New audio from FBI wiretaps features Jimmy Dimora saying “This fucking guy ...” every five seconds. Hollywood insiders predict a healthy post-prison career for Dimora as an extra in Martin Scorsese movies, assuming Scorsese is still making movies when he’s 167.
This Week's Index: You’re rolling through life Kyrie Irving-style: Feeling like a superstar and dreaming of a long stay in C-Town.