Good afternoon, Cleveland. Here's some stuff to read while you pretend mustaches are really magic enough to help the Browns beat the Niners on Sunday.
— If you're a cracked-out couple and you give away a toddler to a stranger, you have to expect some trouble. (NewsNet5)
— A couple stole a $300 turtle from a pet store and got caught. Suburban poverty is really worse than we thought it was. (NewsNet5)
— Rich Lowrie, the "economist" who helped come up with Herman Cain's ever-deteriorating 9-9-9 tax plan, talked to the public. 9-9-9 plan still no clearer than it was before. (Cleveland.com)
— Some of the Browns are heading to San Fran with mustaches. Unless there is a real wide receiver hidden in those mustaches, the Browns will still lose. (WFNY Tumblr)