Tenacious Tea

Rockers sing about teabagging and corpulent porn stars.

Cleveland art
The Canton duo Blood, Sweat & Beers calls its synth-pop live shows “adult entertainment.” One listen to the lyrics of “Russell Crowe” proves them right: “If [the head of a penis] were a helmet on your nose/This would be Russell Crowe’s.” Explains guitarist Patrick “Big Pat” Masalko: “When you’re teabagging someone, it looks like a Roman-war helmet” like the one Crowe wore in Gladiator.

Also look out for originals like “Kim Kelly,” which is about a real-life, 210-pound gal who made tabloid headlines in 2004 when she went on a sperm-and-milkshake diet. “She had nothing but man juice and banana smoothies,” says Masalko. “She’s an overweight porn star and proud of it.”

The 6-foot-2, 360-pound Masalko admits even he gets grossed out by some of the band’s lyrics. “We’ve been called Tenacious D with no class,” he says. “That right there should tell you something.”
Fri., Dec. 15, 8:30 p.m.

Like this story?
SCENE Supporters make it possible to tell the Cleveland stories you won’t find elsewhere.
Become a supporter today.
Scroll to read more Things to Do articles

Newsletters

Join Cleveland Scene Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.