They Are Not Men

Devo 2.0 -- the perfect punch line to a perfect joke.

Devo's a fucking joke. Seriously. The energy domes, Chinaman, Booji Boy -- it's all intended as some snarky postmodern riddle about how you and I are fat morons with few interests beyond jerking off and eating donuts.

It was a pretty funny joke, too, until the band left Akron, did coke with Dan Aykroyd, and began to suck.

Now the joke's on Devo, whose members have been reduced to the corporate blowjobs they so loudly mocked in the late '70s. They and their fans may tell you that it's all part of the joke, but it's not. Bassist Jerry Casale is truly a Mongoloid, as is his most recent pet project, Devo 2.0.

Devo 2.0 is a tween tribute band devised by Casale and funded by Disney in the belief that 10-year-olds love ironic punk songs like "Freedom of Choice." The band's five members are between 10 and 13. Their interests include Kelly Clarkson and musical theater. They will be performing at a mall near you.

Sure, it's the ultimate gimmick of devolution, but it's also downright embarrassing to hear 13-year-old lead singer Nicole rape the beauty of "Girl U Want" for the sake of Casale's wallet.

It's also upsetting to hear Miss Mosquito Bites mickey-mouseify "Beautiful World" by singing the song's punch line as "It's a beautiful world for you/I guess me too!" That revision isn't brilliantly postmodern -- it's lame.

The only way Devo 2.0 would be remotely awesome is if Casale (who creepily calls himself "Uncle Jerry") convinced the five tweens to perform "Bamboo Bimbo" in blackface.

Now that would be totally DE-VO!