GOP stiffs Cleveland

The GOP has chosen the site for its convention, and it ain't us. Minneapolis-St. Paul will host the 2008 Republican shindig, according to CNN. Of course, everybody except Sam Fulwood knew this was a foregone conclusion. After all, Cleveland makes not the perfect poster child for demonstrating to the nation just how well Republican policies have worked. With a handy assist from local Democrats, the city is almost as much a symbol of government incompetence as Katrina-ravaged New Orleans. We are yet again the poorest town in the nation, proving that President Bush's much-lauded tax cuts didn't do much for guys without yachting attire. Our school system is in shambles, leaving pretty much every kid behind. And our election system is in such a sorry state that we've become the national model for How to Steal and Election. All of which makes it rather difficult for Republicans to "Believe In Cleveland." -- Kevin Hoffman