GREAT MOMENTS IN BAD SPORTS ANALOGIES

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It's no secret that politicians are horribly out of touch with real life — that is, after all, what happens when the person hired to rake your backyard pays themselves by picking up dollars from your money tree (scientific name: Contractoricus Briberus Plentifulius) before they get blown into your brand new in-ground swimming pool.

This detachment is readily apparent when politicians attempt to explain things in a straight-forward manner. It's even more clear when they endeavor into analogy land — especially sports analogy land — as recently evidenced by Peter Lawson Jones.

If you've been following the Med Mart deal the past few weeks you've surely read about Cavs owner Dan Gilbert's objections to locating the project at the old convention center site, to which Tim Hagan testily replied, "Tell Gilbert to move to Cuyahoga County and run for county commissioner."

Well, the confluence between the Cavs and the Med Mart deal was furthered by Jones when he tried to rationalize spending $900+ million on a huge public funding project (that would be underground) and answer another of Gilbert's complaints, namely that MMPI would be allowed to collect millions of dollars in fees before the center ever opens.

Jones said the deal was not one-sided in favor of MMPI, and he used a Cavalier-themed comparison to describe the agreement, when he said ,"You can't get LeBron James for Larry Hughes money."

(/shaking head)

Oh, Peter. Where to start?