Robber Nabs $4.10

Im rich, bitches.
  • I'm rich, bitches.

Without more details, it's hard to give precise advice to the suspect in two Akron-area robberies last weekend, but a good place to start would be to focus on potential targets that would net him a five-spot, at the very least.


Pillitiere's Restaurant on East Waterloo Road and Geppetto's Pizza on Aster Avenue were both burglarized early Saturday morning.

Police say the culprit in each case threw a rock through a window and tampered with cash registers. A total of $4.10 in change was taken from both businesses, police said.

The robber is still on the loose, which makes sense. He likely took his $4.10 windfall and hightailed it to the French Riviera, where he will bask in his wealth amid tanned beauties, yachts, and caviar. Akron is but a small blip in his rearview mirror by now.