Lorain Burglary is Quintessentially Lorain-y


We occasionally poke fun at Lorain, Cleveland's step brother to the west, and not without good reason. The blotters fill up weekly with some of the most deranged and stupid crimes you're likely to come across.

Take this story for instance, which is graded 100% Grade-A Lorain prime. Three teens were arrested after breaking into a store and making off with some choice product. The Morning Journal breaks down the targets of their sticky fingers:

The 14-year-old boy caught on the ground had a bag with 11 packages of Black and Mild cigarettes, two pairs of sunglasses, 15 candy bars, two cartons of Marlboro menthol 100s cigarettes, four cans of Monster energy drinks, and 29 $5 instant lottery tickets, the report said.

The 15-year-old boy had a bag with seven candy bars, two bottles of wine, two Monster energy drinks, one Monster espresso drink, one NOS energy drink, a pair of sunglasses, Eclipse gum, $61 in cash, a box of Newport cigarettes, two bandannas and a white shirt, the report said.