A New Fine Dining Breastaurant to Open Near Downtown Casino

Welcome to America, enjoy your cheesy fries.
  • Welcome to America, enjoy your cheesy fries.

The moneybackers behind the new Cleveland Horseshoe Casino no doubt want you to think their target customer market is all those twenty and thirtysomething young professionals with stylish duds, the right credentials, and cash to piss, because we all know that demographic really actually totally does exist outside of promotional brochures and teeth whiting commercials. But real talk, who's going to be filling up the Cleveland casino?

Bros.

At least, that apparently is the customer base in the cross-hairs at the Tilted Kilt, the new restaurant filling in the old Fat Fish Blue location, hoping to capitalize on the run off business from the Higbee site. Seeing how Cleveland already has a short-skirt staffed bar near the casino, some market researcher must have figured the Horseshoe's clientele will be high enough in guys who haven't had a meaningful experience with a woman since the Hooters closed in Parma to justify the investment.

Oh, sorry, did we say restaurant? We actually mean “breastaurant,” according to this thinkpiece from MacLeans on the abrupt rise of over-sexed dining spots looking to pull in male customers thanks to female help well-versed in “touchology.” This is what we're in for: