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Thump the Stumpers 

"Mr. New York" takes comedic whacks at candidates.

Comic Bobby Collins admits his act has gone political, because "the gene pool could use some chlorine." And none of the presidential candiates are spared his ridicule. "What's running for president is not the cream of the crop of our country. If anything, we've got the bottom-dwellers. They're spending over 100 million dollars each to buy the presidency, and people actually believe that their one vote counts," says Collins, who's at Pickwick & Frolic's Hilarities comedy club this weekend to peddle his new CD, Mr. New York. "How sick is this?"For starters, he says, Americans can't trust a Democrat like Hillary Clinton to run the government, when she can't even keep track of good ol' philandering Bill. And Republican John McCain doesn't impress him either. "He spent six years as a POW. He's 97 years old. And when he speaks, you notice how his eyebrows go up real crazy?" asks Collins, whose film credits include 1994's Car 54, Where Are You? with Fran Drescher and Rosie O'Donnell. "He's having one of those flashbacks."And don't get him started on either party's involvement with both the Iraq war and skyrocketing gas prices. "We invaded another country. Then we found out later that the politicians jerked us off into believing that was right," says Collins. "I'm paying $3.99 a gallon for gas, and this is supposedly the center for oil? Let's go shopping!" Showtime is 7:30 and 10:15 p.m. today and tomorrow at Hilarities, 2035 East Fourth Street. Tickets are $18 to $25. Call 216-241-7423 or visit
March 7-8, 7:30 & 10:15 p.m., 2008

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