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The Osbourne Family Album (Epic)

At just under an hour, The Osbourne Family Album manages to pay tribute to Ozzy while giving a boost to Jack and Kelly Osbourne's burgeoning music-biz gigs (dour Dillusion, whom talent-scout Jack's been developing for Epic, appears here for that reason alone, and Kelly previews her forthcoming debut with a rote run-through of Madonna's "Papa Don't Preach"). And it's all in time to remind everyone that it's not too late to pick up your Ozzfest tix. Not to mention the fact that this mix tape comes shrink-wrapped in the coattails of The Osbournes' success, each song bracketed by a curse-heavy clip from MTV's snit-com. How do songs by the Kinks, John Lennon, Eric Clapton, and the Cars figure into it all? In order: Ozzy loves the Kinks and Lennon, Ozzy and Sharon love Clapton's "Wonderful Tonight," and they all love older sis Aimee (who doesn't appear on the show), and she loves the Cars' "Drive." Or she did when she was a baby, at any rate. But hey, like it matters. As a compilation album, Family Album doesn't really hold together. As an example of Sharon Osbourne's business acumen and family loyalty, it's pure genius.

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