Now here’s a holiday we can really get behind: the fourth annual International Day of Slayer (IDoS).
In honor of IDoS on Sunday, fans around the world will be staging “Slay-Outs,” in which they will listen to Slayer songs at full volume wherever they happen to be.
“DO NOT use headphones!” advises the website. “The objective of this day is for everyone within earshot to understand that it is the National Day of Slayer. National holidays in America aren’t just about celebrating; they're about forcing it upon non-participants.”
It suggests staging a huge block party that ends in a full-scale riot, and killing your neighbor’s dog and blaming it on Slayer (which we don’t recommend). Or you can just buy a Slayer album, which we do recommend.
Founding the holiday in response to May’s National Day of Prayer, IDoS organizers have asked the White House to officially recognize the holiday.
So far, no strains of “Raining Blood” or “Hell Awaits” have been heard emanating from the Oval Office. —Anastasia Pantsios