Hot Action Cop

Friday, November 28, at Peabody's.

Aroma 33481 Lake Road, Avon Lake 440-933-4360. Lunch: 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Thursday and Friday. Dinner: 5-10 p.m. Monday through Saturday
Somewhere between Sugar Ray's pasty-faced Afro puffs and Crazy Town's tighty-whitey posing lies Hot Action Cop. Head Cop Rob Werthner relocated from New York to Nashville, ostensibly to delve into the country-music capital's allegedly thriving hip-hop scene.

As a rapper, however, Werthner sounds like he's spent most of his time in Hollywood, peppering his pedestrian mic attempts with tall tales of teenage debauchery that would make the cast of American Pie blush. "So I'm dreamin' that I'm sleeping with Britney Spears/And then I wake up to the smell of cigarettes and beer," he ejaculates on "Don't Want Her to Stay." The noxious mini-hit "Fever for the Flavor" has the audacity to rhyme "hootchie" and "kootchie" with a straight face, and the doe-eyed "soul" ballad "The Special" is supposed to atone for sexist, taint-by-numbers party jams with cute titles like "Club Slut" and "Goin' Down on It."

To its credit, the band is an equal-opportunity scavenger, pilfering from Alice in Chains ("Face Around"), the Red Hot Chili Peppers ("Doom Boom"), and Uncle Kracker ("Alayal" -- as in, "I wanna get with all of y'all girls"). But Hot Action Cop has arrived at the rap-rock party a few years too late, submitting a clichéd set of low-wattage retreads.

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