A friendly note from Pollacks: That guy with his wang in the household appliance, he’s not ours

For as long as men have worn knee-high socks with shorts and t-shirts and called them their “nice clothes,” Polish people have been the unfortunate butt of many, many jokes. They started long ago, these yarns, back before my father learned the correct placement of a pink flamingo in his front yard, and before his father learned the same thing in Warsaw years ago, between spoonfuls of pickled onions and sauerkraut pierogi. Yes, we know how many of us it takes to screw in a light bulb: Just a few more than the number of old Polish grandmas it takes to shove a piece of garlic-stuffed kielbasa up your ass. But whatever. ...