Jaywalkers -- caught red-footed; 'Gost story; Green eggs and hamhanded columnists.

The Broken Hearts Club
Fox 8 News brought new meaning to the concept of unintentional self-parody last week with its investigation of -- get this -- jaywalking. "I-Team" ace Carl Monday captured video of cops, prosecutors, and judges brazenly crossing the middle of the street on their way to the Justice Center. In the most dramatic moment, Judge Thomas Curran was shown with the voiceover, "Apparently, he thinks he's above the law." Monday then confronted the judge with his best Skippy-does-Mike-Wallace impression.

Fox 8's "blockbuster" investigation -- Fox's word, not ours -- came in response to Cleveland's supposed crackdown on jaywalking. But those ensnared don't seem particularly humbled. "I don't regret it now," said a laughing Judge Pat Cleary. "I'll admit to speeding, too." The Edge can't wait for Fox 8's next I-Team blockbuster, "County Officials Who Occasionally Don't Wear Their Seatbelts!"

The Cleveland Museum of Art's wonderful Schreckengost exhibit includes an old firetruck pedal car. It's a beat-up specimen compared to the shiny models displayed next to it. The reason: It was found in its current state in the garage of museum PR flack Bill Prenevost. He thought little of it until he noticed its similarity to Schreckengost's objets d'art. A curator was summoned, and sure enough, it was deemed authentic. The "work" is now displayed on loan from the collection of Nicole L.S. Prenevost -- Bill's eight-year-old daughter.

If you were amused by the epic tedium of Dick Feagler's November 14 column, in which he assessed the presidential balloting catfight in Dr. Seussian verse, take solace in that at least it was unoriginal. The Akron Beacon Journal ran a similar column two days before. It, however, had the good taste to begin with the disclaimer, "The following is presented with the deepest apologies to Dr. Seuss . . ." Speaking of déjà vu, The Edge got that feeling when it saw The PD's recent story on wunderkind TV reporter Carole Chandler. That's because the same story -- albeit a shorter version -- ran two years earlier. It, too, chronicled the sassy reporter's penchant for jumping into freezing water to do a story on hypothermia, etc. But until Chandler conducts her first jaywalking exposé, The Edge doesn't want to hear another word.

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