Lil Rickie in the ’Hood Tomorrow

Wonder how hed look in saggy jeans and an XXXL white tee?
  • Wonder how he'd look in saggy jeans and an XXXL white tee?

GOP presidential candidate Rick Santorum has loaded up his Leadership for Life bus to hit Ohio — and he’ll be coming our way tomorrow with an early afternoon Cleveland stop sandwiched between touchdowns in Toledo and Youngstown.

Naturally, with his tight schedule, you’d think he’d head for the biggest pool of reliable Republican primary voters. So he’s going to — East 112th & Buckeye? The heavily African-American neighborhood generally votes about 90% Democratic — that is, when a Republican even bothers to run for office on this side of town.

But surely, residents of Buckeye will be eager to hear what Republicans are offering on the community’s most pressing issues, like unemployment, foreclosure, education, access to health care, and crime. So Santorum is going to talk about — abortion and gay marriage. He’s even bringing along the dour-faced Maggie Gallagher, who founded the National Organization for Marriage to fight against marriage for gay people.

Here’s what he’ll be trying to sell to the denizens of Buckeye, according to his campaign release:

While all the candidates in the GOP primary are pro-life, Rick Santorum stands out as a proven leader in this great human and civil rights cause of our time. It was Rick Santorum who successfully led the fight to ban the gruesome partial-birth abortion procedure, and he proudly co-sponsored and fought for every single piece of pro-life legislation while in the U.S. Senate.

Folks here would probably be happier to hear he fought to get some decent jobs in their community. But never mind that.

Head on down to the Subway parking lot at 11217 Buckeye at 1:45 p.m. to meet the Leadership for Life bus and see if Lil Rickie will be dropping jams. Apologies to Jay-Z and Kanye West, who most likely will be voting for someone else. — Anastasia Pantsios

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