(Previously) Unpublished Excerpts from the Mitchell Report

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According to unpublished excerpts from the Mitchell Report obtained by McSweeney's, farmer Ray Kinsella and writer Terry Mann used illegal celestial beings to profit off of innocent baseball fans in the late 1980s.
While Roger Clemens' heated denials are making the most headlines regarding Senator George Mitchell's investigation into the use of banned substances in Major League Baseball, Andrew Bridgman, writing for the humor Web site McSweeney's, digs deeper this week. In "Excerpts from the Lost Mitchell Report," the writer reveals unpublished excerpts from the an early draft of the report. These outtakes spotlight the Anaheim Angel's 100-win-streak 1994 season, and make serious allegations all the way back to the 1939, Roy Hobbs-led New York Knights. Also examined is Ray Kinsella's controversial Iowa baseball field. For more goofy off-season baseball reading, also take a look at Daniel Bard and Andrew Miller's "Bugs Bunny, Greatest Banned Player Ever," which takes a look at another golden-age player who, sadly, could have been one of the all-time greats, but was denied the opportunity to play. The piece is the second feature in Houghton Mifflin's The Best Sports Writing 2007, which is a total must-have. -- D.X. Ferris
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