Jesus, do you guys need a babysitter? First we’re all over the Atlantic for our gross algae blooms, now we’re baring our titties to esteemed travel writers.
Via Freshwater Cleveland, Rick Steves’ latest entry for his HuffPo travel series “Road Trip USA” touted some of Cleveland’s, er, charms: namely, our gambling cab drivers and slatternly travel writing fans.
First of all, “Road Trip USA” is a little disingenuous: Steves “rushed to the airport” to catch his plane to Cleveland, which, last time we checked, qualifies as more of a “sky trip.” But no matter: on his ride from the airport, Steves was treated to our city’s “impressive skyline” and a glowing soliloquy from a local cabbie on Cleveland’s most prided landmark: the casino. Check for this little gem in next year’s Best American Travel Writing:
My cabbie couldn't stop talking about Cleveland's Horseshoe Casino. She couldn't believe I'd missed it. "You can gamble and have your food brought right to your machine. And there's a shopping mall right there!"
Who needs Monaco, right?
The northern hospitality didn’t stop there.
After Steves’ March 20th presentation at Playhouse Square, “Europe Through the Back Door,” we offered up all but, uh, the back door. After enthusing about vibrant opening day banners at Progressive Field, Steves himself rounded second base:
…during autograph time, a woman made her plunging neckline a little deeper and asked for my John Hancock on her chest — the highlight of my Sharpie's day. I was given a fun little ornamental guitar and reminded that the next time I visit, I have to make more time for the city — including its beloved Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum.
We’ll leave remarks about Rick’s “Sharpie” to a less classy rag, because we’re heading on over to Horseshoe for some delivery. And Tower City for some turtlenecks. For everyone. Because every day isn't a Mötley Crüe concert and children need boundaries.