Steelers Fans Show Graces, Throw Free Shit at Angelic Browns Girls

Last night, about 30 Steelers fans gathered as always at Panini’s on Coventry to watch Pittsburgh pound Baltimore 38-7. But the Pittsburgh fans had a nasty surprise awaiting them last night: A couple of Browns cheerleader-types were walking through the bar, blocking prime television views and handing out free Browns paraphernalia. Pittsburgh fans, apparently unaware that they live in Cleveland, didn’t take too kindly to this intrusion, throwing the garb back in their faces. The marketing girls were not happy. “They didn’t have to be so fuckin’ rude,” one of them said. “All I said is ‘do you want some free stuff?’ and they started cussing at me. How was I supposed to know they hated the Browns?” The girls retreated to a corner booth where they could no longer be pelted with the same free gear they’d just given out. Meanwhile, Browns safety Sean Jones sat at a booth, picking at some buffalo wings and coolly surveying the scene. “I’m doing a little scouting,” he said. He seemed a bit perplexed by all the Pittsburgh fans at the bar. “We are in Cleveland, aren’t we?” he asked, with a slight frown. Jones admitted that the Steelers were playing pretty well. “We’re going to have to bring our A game this week,” he said of this Sunday's Browns-Steelers showdown in Pittsburgh, before pausing to sign an enlarged 8 x 10 of himself. Meanwhile, small Browns footballs kept whizzing through the bar. One male leaned down to pick it up from the floor when his Steelers-loving girlfriend swatted away his hand. “That’s garbage, honey,” she said. -- Rebecca Meiser
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