Struthers City Official Wants No-Sagging Ordinance

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You are killing America.
  • You are killing America.

Here's the thing about the great institution of Small Town Middle America: it can never just be, its always got to in a huff about something, positioning its white picket battlements against a perceived harbinger that supposedly threatens it's very Small Town Middle Americanness. Music, Guatemalan immigrants, gay marriage – you name it, some small town somewhere is getting up a fight against it.

Down in Struthers, they're spittin' mad about sagging – at least that's what the kids call it on the internets, really it's just letting your butt hang out for all to see, damn rap music. Now what type of goofhead would want everyone to see his underwear? No one wants to see that, or at least that's what the Mahoning County town's safety-services director is trying to tell city council. Ed Wiles wants an ordinance on the books that says your pants have to be sensibly placed when you're in the city building, according to the Vindicator.

To make his case, Wildes actually said this in a council meeting:

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