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Monday, September 25, 2006

Fulwood Watch: Sam explores sex tourism!

Posted By on Mon, Sep 25, 2006 at 12:02 PM

Headline: Sex trip article ignores serious study Date: September 21, 2006 Topic: Sam actually makes a feint toward an interesting topic (2,000 black men take sex tours to Brazil annually), but quickly falls back into his reliable narrative: The Black Struggle as seen through the eyes of a Shaker Heights dilettante. In this case, it's the plight of a black grad student whose research was written up in Essence, which wisely hyped the sex tourism angle. Sam offers justice in the form of a boring column about the plight of black men in modern society. Originality: -3/10. Sammy had a chance to shatter his previous record of 6/10, but stiff-arms originality to earn his first negative score. Bravo, old chap. Difficulty: 3/10. Sam hung out with a Ph.D student named Jewel Woods and stole his thesis. The most difficult decision Sam made was whether to use the "Serious" or "Jocular" headshot. He chose wrong. Sam Gets Poetic: The man who puts the "wooden" in Fulwood offers an elegiac defense for being a bore: "People prefer tacky articles that offer giggles about what a relatively few black men do in Rio." Not Sam! He only reads The New Yorker. The Master Has Spoken: "For my money, I'd rather read about how Woods teaches many more black men to improve themselves at home." On Sam's planet, Cosmo runs teasers that say, "Improve Yourself at Home! And We Don't Mean Sexually!" What Sam Reveals About Sam: When it comes to Essence, Fullwood is a journalistic playa-hata. CliffsNotes Version: Wow! Essence has an article on black men going to Rio to hook up with bubble-butted Brazilian babes! But Essence missed the more interesting story: "the total erasure of black professional male identity in American society." I'm sure there's some kind of latent racism going on here, but damned if I can stop thinking about that Brazilian badonkadonk! See previous installments of Fulwood Watch.

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