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Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Nip/Tuck does Akron. Literally.

Posted By on Tue, Oct 10, 2006 at 2:33 PM

Nip/Tuck does Northeast Ohio. Literally.
Nip/Tuck, the FX drama about a pair of loveably dysfunctional plastic surgeons, recently added a character from Akron to flesh out the fourth season's cast of self-destructive sex addicts. Yeah, she's a total slut from Akron — can you believe it? Monica Wilder (played by Jessica Hall) is a homely nursing student who moved from Akron to Miami. As main characters Sean and Julia McNamara await the birth of their lobster-clawed child, they're busy interviewing potential night nurses. Wilder puts on her best "I'm just a simple girl from Akron" act. When the interview is over, Sean gives her a ride home, only to make a small detour to a motel, where they get it on. The best part about Wilder is her long monologues about her life back home in the Ak-rowdy — how she humped her previous employer's husband (who we'll assume lived on Merriman Road) and how she was "pretty for Akron," but feels like a total dog in Miami. Wilder really is all things Akron: ugly, insecure, unfashionable, and she can bake a mean pot brownie. She can also totally get down to Journey in a pair of granny panties. I can't wait to watch her go psycho-stalker on Sean. You know it's gonna happen — not just because Nip/Tuck plots are totally transparent — but because all Akronites reign supreme when it comes to obsessive behavior. Have you seen us drink? Since pop culture references to Akron are about as common as Haley's Comet (with the exception of that one Seinfeld episode where George flies to Akron to chew out a former co-worker), I won't whine. I am, however, extremely concerned about what this is going to do to our tourism industry. Check out this comment about Wilder from "That nanny is gonna do somethin' real creepy. I can tell already. And she's from Akron. Fuck Akron!" — Denise Grollmus

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