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Monday, February 25, 2008

Followers of the Maharishi are building a peace palace in Parma

Posted By on Mon, Feb 25, 2008 at 5:43 AM

Followers of this recently deceased hippie are building a peace palace in Parma. City officials hope that they'll have really good weed.
Two weeks ago, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, the man who taught yoga to the Beatles and brought transcendental meditation to the masses, died at his home in the Netherlands. Before his death, the Maharishi claimed that he alone held the secrets of the world. But if one percent of the world would start practicing yoga, then the universe would experience peace and tranquility. But as he got older and realized that one percent of the world wouldn’t become his followers, he decided to lower the bar a bit. If “the square root of one percent” became adherents, then there’d be world peace… Still no dice. Then he died. So adherents decided on a new goal: They’d build “peace palaces” -- $5 million buildings with dormitories and classrooms where transcendentalism and yoga would be taught. They’ve already built three, and announced plans for at least a dozen more. But the newest palace isn’t being built in LA or NY -- home to macrobiotic carrot muffins and vitamin water. No, it’s coming to Parma. Ohio. Home of beer, brats, and people who tend to believe that guys with long beards and robes might well be some kind of pervert. . Asked if town and religion might be an odd match, city spokesman Powell Caesar says that “In the United States of America, you can’t say or choose one religion over another. This is only an issue of zoning.” We’re taking that to mean, “Holy shit, the hippies are coming to Parma, and there not a damn thing we can do about it.” – Rebecca Meiser


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