Whiskey Business returns to Red Space on Friday, November 9 - Limited Tickets Available Here!

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Cleveland Charter Schools: Stoner Havens?

Posted By on Tue, Feb 19, 2013 at 1:48 PM


Last Thursday at Citizens Academy, a “high-performing public charter school” near University Circle, school authorities were appalled when they found a bag of weed in a 5-year-old’s backpack.

When asked if he was aware of the contents of the bag, the boy identified the substance as “his dad’s weed that he smokes.” The boy’s parents told police that they “mistakenly gave” the bag to their son and are now planning to contest the misleading semantics of “high-performing” in court. Punishment for their “fucking lamewad narc son” is forthcoming, but may involve a strict diet of schwag bud now that they know he “definitely can’t handle his shit."

Incidentally, Flesh-N-Bone delivered a similarly persuasive apologia to us in 2000 when he was convicted for stashing his AK-47 in a baby crib.

Comments (2)

Showing 1-2 of 2

Add a comment

Subscribe to this thread:
Showing 1-2 of 2

Add a comment


Never miss a beat

Sign Up Now

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.


© 2018 Cleveland Scene: 737 Bolivar Rd., Suite 4100, Cleveland, OH 44115, (216) 241-7550
Logos and trademarks on this site are property of their respective owners.

Website powered by Foundation