As long as there has been monogamy there has been cheating. How could there not be? Many humans are not wired to have one partner for the rest of their lives. Unfortunately, society has made people think this is their only option.
You might find yourself in this boat. Maybe you are happily married but curious or unhappily married and looking for a panic button. Lucky for you we live in an age of online dating and some dating sites are specifically designed with you in mind.
Dating sites make it easy to find a person that is perfectly okay with the fact that you are married. In fact, they might be in a similar situation themself or not want the commitment of a full-time partner. If this is something you're looking for, let's dive into this new world of apps for cheating and affairs.
Cheating Vs. Ethical Non-Monogamy
Just because you are married and dating does not mean that you are cheating. Some relationships have come to a mutual understanding of ethical non-monogamy in which both partners are committed to their marriage but have some flexibility in their monogamy.
Obviously, if this agreement is something you and your partner can come to you'll get to maintain the security of your marriage. You probably will have some guilt about going behind your spouse's back if you go don't have an agreement like this.
The online platforms we're going to walk through are sites that work for individuals that are married but looking. If you're married and you're seeking an affair with or without your partner's knowledge you'll notice traditional dating apps might not encourage your choice.
That's okay, traditionally those platforms are geared towards monogamy or relationships between single individuals. If you're seeking a hookup website or app that's going to be fully accepting of your marital status have no fear— married but looking sites are on the rise and we've rounded up the ones that really work.
: Best Overall Affair Site
: Best hookup site for extramarital affairs
: Best for wealthy men
: Best for privacy
: Best for passionate encounters
: UK affair dating site
7. Hush Affairs
: Best for secret partners
: Discreet dating for women
9. Reddit /r/Affairs/
: Affair forum
: Encrypted message and photo app
1. AshleyMadison: Best Overall Affair Site
Ashley Madison has always been the heavy hitter when it comes to dating while married. While there are many dating sites for cheating Ashley Madison was the first site to streamline the process and make it mainstream. Despite having a security breach a few years back this site came back stronger than ever.
According to Forbes, Ashley Madison is going strong with over 30 million users signed up
. You might be inclined to think Ashley Madison only hosts men and sugar babies but you'd be wrong. Plenty of married ladies who are seeking a fling flock to the site as well.
Because Ashley Madison has been around for so long they've completely dialed in on their user experience. Ashley Madison is so advanced it has streamlined the customer's journey from the web to an app so you can have your needs met on the road. Both the Ashley Madison site and the app have tons of profiles of attractive individuals that are open to matching with married members.
Cost: You can get started on Ashley Madison at no cost. To upgrade, you'll have to purchase a premium package. The premium packages range from $54.99 all the way up to $249.99.
Visit Ashley Madison
2. Adultfriendfinder: Best hookup site for extramarital affairs
AdultFriendFinder is an excellent option for all types of casual dating, including affairs. This site has made a name for itself as one of the best platforms for extramarital affairs on the web. This site is also excellent for finding threesomes and swingers. If you're interested in a discreet app for married dating, this is the one.
AdultFriendFinder hands you the reins when it comes to finding matches. Unlike platforms that use an algorithm and limit who you can message, AFF lets you browse as many profiles as you want. Once you find someone who looks interesting, just send them a message to get the ball rolling.
Because this dating app doesn't depend on an algorithm, it's really important that you write a good user bio. If you're seeking a discreet encounter, make that clear to other users. Other than that, AFF is a super straightforward and easy-to-use app for finding affairs in your city.
Cost: Joining AdultFriendFinder is free. All you need to do is sign up with a valid email address and user name.
3. Seeking: Best for wealthy men
Seeking is a great option for financially successful men seeking a young and attractive woman. This dating site is exclusively for sugar babies and sugar daddies. Now, just a word of advice— if you're a sugar daddy using this dating site, be prepared to spend some money. In a sugar relationship, money is the name of the game.
That being said, if you're a married man who wants to meet a gorgeous young mistress, this is the way to go. Seeking boasts an impressively high success rate. Most members find their sugar baby in about 5 days.
The reason for this success is the high ratio of female to male users. Female users can sign up at no cost, which encourages a high number of female users. If this is your cup of tea, you can sign up with just an email address and user name.
Cost: Seeking is free for female users. Male users can purchase memberships starting at around $90 per month.
4. VictoriaMilan: Best for privacy
VictoriaMilan has made waves in the affair dating world. This affair app markets itself as the number one affair website. Now, this is a bold claim to make, but VictoriaMilan really does work. With over 6 million active users, it's not hard to see why.
Here's how it works. In order to really ensure the privacy of each user, this app uses unique technology. Face blurring features are used to blur out any details you want to hide in your photos. Each user can choose an anonymous user name to ensure maximum security.
Unlike other platforms that require a Facebook login, this app allows you to join with your email. Lastly, VictoriaMilan never asks for any personal details so you can rest assured your identity is safe. If your number one priority is privacy, I highly recommend this option.
Cost: You can get started on VictoriaMilan for free. Head to the website or Google Play Store to get started.
5. HeatedAffairs: Best for passionate encounters
As the name implies, HeatedAffairs are for those of you who are really trying to spice things up. This website is all about passionate, wild flings. HeatedAffairs is the world's largest affair website on the internet with over 48 million members. That absolutely massive user base makes it easy for cheaters and singles to find affairs quickly and easily.
Aside from finding discreet encounters, members can also get married dating advice to help you on your extramarital journey. One of the best features on this website is the chat feature. Not only can you chat with other users, but you can also access professional adult chat hosts for some online fun. You can access HeatedAffairs on your desktop or on your mobile device.
Cost: You can sign up for HeatedAffairs for free. To access the premium features, you can sign up for a premium membership. Paid membership starts at around $40 per month.
6. IllicitEncounters: UK affair dating site
Here's an option for all the UK readers. IllicitEncounters is an extramarital dating platform for individuals based in the United Kingdom. This option is also great for those of you who are traveling to the UK and wish to meet up with someone on your trip. I highly recommend this platform for anyone seeking casual sex outside of their marriage while they are traveling.
IllicitEncounters has been around for nearly two decades, and it's safe to say they know what they're doing. The environment on this platform is open-minded so you don't have to worry about judgemental users. One of the best things about this dating platform is the relatively equal man to woman ratio. Male users don't have to worry about finding women, and women are not overwhelmed by male users.
Because of this ratio, most users have no problem at all finding a great match. Overall, this is a trusted and established option for anyone interested in sites for married dating.
Cost: IllicitEncounters is completely free to join. In order to access premium features, you will have to upgrade to a paid plan. Paid plans start at 149 pounds for one month.
7. Hush Affairs: Best for secret partners
Out of all the dating sites on this list, this is the best one for finding a super discreet affair. If you're seeking a partner aside from your spouse, it only makes sense to keep it a secret. HushAffairs prioritizes your anonymity so that your extramarital activities remain hush-hush.
In order to get started on HushAffairs, you'll need to create your personal account. This process is super fast and easy. All you need is an email, a username, and a password. Once that's all set, the fun begins. Users can browse through other profiles and message users who look interesting. Once you connect with someone promising, you can set a time and a date to meet up and begin your discreet fling.
Just as a word of advice— this dating platform does encounter the issue of fake profiles every now and then. Compared to other affair platforms, HushAffairs doesn't offer as many verification features. For that reason, it's smart to exercise a bit of caution here. Just remember not to give out any personal or financial information to other users and you should be good to go.
Cost: Signing up for HushAffairs is free. To message other users you'll have to upgrade to a paid account.
8. Gleeden: Discreet dating for women
When it comes to cheating sites, Gleeden offers an exciting option. Gleeden comes through with one of the most unique extramarital dating platforms out there. That's because Gleeden was made by women, for women. Most dating platforms for dating outside of your marriage are catered towards male users. Gleeden gives the ladies an opportunity to discover exactly what they are looking for.
Gleeden offers everything you could desire in a married dating platform. Female cheaters seeking casual sex, or a long-term fling can browse through profiles, look at pictures, and chat with other users in a shame-free environment.
Gleeden makes security a top priority. Users never have to worry about their information leaking. On top of that, Gleeden ensures that users are able to maintain anonymity with picture blurring, and other specific features to protect your identity.
One of the best features of Gleeden is user moderation. Ladies often find that virtual dating can be filled with unsavory characters. This platform ensures that all users are respectful and serious about extramarital dating. The best part about this option is that it's totally free for female users.
Cost: Gleeden is free for female members. Male users can purchase credit packages based on what is affordable for them.
9. Reddit /r/Affairs/
: Affair forum
When people think of Reddit, they often think of cute dog pics and goofy memes. What you may not know, is that Reddit is an amazing place for cheaters to connect with like-minded individuals.
For individuals looking to cheat on their spouses, Reddit is one of the most underrated sites for cheating. I will say, Reddit differs from the other options on this list because it is also a form of social media. That means you can chat with members, leave comments, vote for your favorite pictures, and send direct messages.
Reddit often has forums for specific cities all over the world, so make sure to check if your city has its own forum for cheaters. To get you started in the right direction, I recommend checking out r/affairs. This specific subreddit caters exclusively to those of you seeking an affair or partner outside of your marriage.
Users can connect on the platform and meet in person when the time is right. Since it's Reddit, membership is totally free.
Cost: Membership on Reddit is completely free. If you want to send a virtual gift to someone, you can purchase Reddit coins, but it is not necessary to enjoy the platform.
10. Signal: Encrypted message and photo app
This option is for those of you who already have a special someone outside of your marriage. Signal won't help you find someone to cheat with, but it will help you hide the details from your significant other.
Signal is an app formulated to protect your text messages at all costs. It's so effective, that it's become the number one privacy app for Edward Snowden. When you use Signal, you can rest assured that every text you send and call you to make is fully encrypted. That means nobody can hack into your messages, not even the company itself.
Signal uses your phone's data connection so you don't have to worry about using up your texts or minutes. Needless to say, Signal offers an easy way to cheat without the worry of getting caught.
: Signal App is free to download with no hidden fees.
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Best Practices On Sites For Cheating
It sounds like a no-brainer but you'll obviously want to protect your identity while using any sites of affair dating. Affairs bring out jealousy which can make people do crazy things. The number one piece of advice I can give you is to cover your tracks
Use an email address specifically for your dating profiles
and use an alias. Obviously, you can disclose your real information once you've gotten to know and trust someone but initially, you'll want to use something else.
Assuming all goes well and things start progressing make sure to always use protection
. It's considerate to your spouse and many affairs get detected through STDs. Cheaters constantly get caught by passing along something to their spouses. Use protection and get checked often.
Get a burner phone
. If you’re married, chances are your husband or wife is on the same phone plan. Get a burner phone and keep it somewhere it won't be found. Make sure it is password protected as well. With all this technology in your pocket, the chances of being tracked go way up.
: Share your everyday phone location with your spouse and then leave your everyday phone at work or at a friend's house while you go get up to your extracurricular activities with your mistress. This way if your spouse suspects something, they will see your location as at your work.
Remember you can save yourself from all of this by coming to an ethically non-monogamous agreement
with your spouse. If not— hey, you've got an itch to scratch. Let's dig into the most dependable sites and apps to make it happen.
Finding that special someone aside from your spouse doesn’t have to be difficult. Consider talking to your spouse and coming to a mutual agreement on extramarital activities. This is the easiest way to do married dating. If that’s not in the cards for you, there are plenty of options that can help you find an affair in no time at all. Browse through the opinions we’ve laid out above and begin your extramarital journey.