For-the-ladies jams are few and far between on Before I Self
Destruct, 50 Cent’s fourth album. As a cavalcade of pre-release
mixtapes suggested, Destruct is an unabashedly militant
for-the-streets disc; this is 50 in druglord/CEO mode, issuing orders
and Black Card-holder’s brags in an increasingly gravel-pit bark over
alternately sumptuous and head-ringing (if not quite “In Da Club”
vintage) bangers for almost an hour.
It all adds up to a thoroughly adequate result that’s nonetheless
enjoyable if you consider that Destruct is little more than a
loss-leader cog in a painfully cynical merchandizing campaign that
shows no signs of slowing anytime soon. So the moments to treasure are
minor: “Stretch” reveals 50’s Fantastic Four and Plastic Man geekery;
R. Kelly all but admits unsmilingly to fecal obsession on the hook to
“Could’ve Been You”; “Gangsta’s Delight” flips the Sugarhill Gang
classic “Rapper’s Delight”; Eminem delivers a gruesome Octomom riff on
“Psycho”; and 50 cheekily re-christens himself as “Curt Cocaine.” Buy
the book, wear the cologne, gulp the sugar water and blast the album.
— Ray Cummings
This article appears in Nov 18-24, 2009.
