The film begins by introducing us to a cocaine-fueled limo driver named Stretch (Patrick Wilson), as he’s t-boned by a car running a red light. He’s promptly sent airborne through his driver side window, landing relatively unharmed on the pavement. He walks to see how the driver of the other vehicle is, which is when he meets the beautiful Candice (Brooklyn Decker) and thus begins a year-long relationship.That’s among the weirder plot points for a movie we’ve heard of, and we’d put it up there with Captain America shutting down the Captain America Shoreway and Katie Holmes having lunch around Tremont as notable moments in Cleveland’s recent brushes with Hollywood.Stretch goes clean, things are going well with Candice until she reveals she’s dumping him for the quarterback of the Cleveland Browns.
That’s part of the plot of “Stretch,” which, as this site mentions, is a really fun B-movie starring, among others, Ray Liotta (as himself) and David Hasselhoff (as himself). The rest of the plot rundown is as crazy as the first part and can be found at the previous link. Trailer below.
This article appears in Oct 22-28, 2014.
It sounds ridiculously perfect. If the film is half as good as the shot of B-weed you dug up, well, I can’t wait.
Any picture of Brandon Weeden in a Browns uniform gives me nightmares for at least a week afterwards.