Any city has guidelines that most people for whatever reason stick by. They’re unwritten, but they’re just known. We were inspired by this Reddit Thread to actually write down the unwritten rules of Cleveland. What would you add?
All photos via Scene archives unless otherwise noted
See the Lake? That’s North.
Via KBAM_Enthusiast/RedditAt some point or another, everyone takes a “cruise” on The Goodtime III, although I have no idea why.
Via HindSiteIs2021/RedditTim Misny
Photo via Scene ArchivesThere is no such thing as Spring. In Cleveland there is this extended season called Sprinter.
Via DukeofDallas_/RedditIt’s always ten degrees colder downtown and ten degrees warmer at Cedar Point.
Via BreathingFire440/RedditYou have to have ‘Cleveland’ in your Twitter bioThat strip of grass between the sidewalk and street is called the tree lawn.
Via TrilliumCLE/Reddit
Photo via Wikimedia CommonsIt will always be the Gund Arena and Jacobs Field.
Via RJRaskle/RedditYou are only separated by two degrees. Guaranteed the person you just met knows at least 3 of your friends.
Via Drthomk/RedditA Polish Boy is a citywide treasure even if you’ve never had oneWhen you visit the airport there will be lots of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame paraphernalia everywhere, but no actual rock music ever playing.
Via AlwaysBrightandMerry/RedditOur River Used to Catch on Fire
Yes, we’re sick of all the stupid fire jokes too. Here’s the thing though – these jokes are usually terrible, and wrong. The jokes usually start off wrong by saying that the lake caught on fire. Real Clevelanders know it was the Cuyahoga River. Also, it happened multiple times. And, the 1952 fire helped create the Clean Water Act, so take that.
Photo via Scene ArchivesGoing to the islands means Put-In-Bay or Kelleys IslandIt’s pop, not soda.
Via SevereCriticism3876/Reddit Credit: Scene ArchivesDetroit is a better city than Cleveland.
No offense to our neighbors to the north, but this just isn’t true.
Photo via Scene Archives Credit: Scene ArchivesDeep hatred for the Steelers.
Via MoscatoDogisCute/RedditYou have to either like or pretend to like Mr. Hero.
Via AFlaccidNarwhal/RedditMichael Stanley
Photo via Scene ArchivesWatch your speed through Linndale (and Newburgh).
Via TheNickySixSix/Reddit Credit: Scene ArchivesYou have to suggest Lido Lounge to anyone who asks for recommendations.
Via Krvstn/Reddit Credit: Scene ArchivesLeg Lamps.
Via Eodtec1985/RedditBetween the ages of 22 and 30, you will be required to, at some point, live in Lakewood (or Cleveland Heights).
Via HitlerKindaSucked/RedditOn 90 make sure to pile into the fast lane to go slower than the other 3 lanes.
Via TopGear9123/RedditEvery time you visit the Flats you have to comment on how much the area has improved.
Via Tehrational/RedditVociferously Debating Which Side of Town Is Best
We’re all Clevelanders, it doesn’t really matter which side is the best. (We know, it’s whatever side you’re from.)
Photo via Wikimedia CommonsDick Goddard is a goddamn legend
Via WhiskeyJaro_/RedditThe Cleveland Flea hasn’t existed in years but it will be the center of drama at least once a yearFall is also called Clambake SeasonYou have a Malley’s bumper sticker but you’re not sure why Credit: Scene ArchivesWe measure distance by time and not miles. Example: “How far is Cedar Point?” Answer “About an hour and a half”. “Where’s the nearest gas station?” “About 5 minutes and it’ll be on your left.”
Via DaffyDC/RedditNever forgetting the Warriors blew a 3-1 lead in the 2016 NBA Finals.
Via Stephapeaz/RedditThe Browns quarterback will never be good enough to get universal support Credit: Scene ArchivesYou love and hate Blossom Music CenterYou must post pics from the two weeks of FallBarrio is somehow a controversial topicYou talk through every concert you go toDo not share the Jennings shortcut with outsiders.
Via JamesRenner/Reddit
