Bar of Gold
Insult comedians such as Don Rickles usually ended their roasting of sundry people in the audience by murmuring, with fake sincerity, “I kid because I care.” That line has now become a throwaway cliché, but as with most hackneyed phrases, there’s a truth down deep. We joke with our friends, making fun of their dating…
Lovedrug
What does an emo band like the Reunion Show do when its attempts to meld pleasant power pop with keyboards fall flatter than Ashlee Simpson’s high notes? Why, completely reinvent itself as a band that could have been MTV darlings when Ms. “Pieces of Me” was still in diapers. Enter Action Action, the neo-new wave…
Annual Ohio Corruption Report
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the annual meeting of the Ohio Association of Corrupt State & Municipal Employees. Before we begin, let’s have a round of applause for the banquet staff here at the Hyatt. That was a delightful chicken Parmesan, wasn’t it? [Clapping] Now, as you can see from the PowerPoint presentation behind me,…
On Stage
The Children’s Hour — Set in a private school for girls, Lillian Hellman’s 1934 play about the power of a lie meanders slowly through its first two acts, establishing the school’s two dedicated owner-instructors, Karen Wright and Martha Dobie, along with their demon-seed student, Mary Tilford (played wonderfully by Heather Farr). An Ann Coulter mini-me,…
The 10th Annual Super Bowl Party
No, the Browns aren’t in Super Bowl XXXIX, but here’s the glass-half-full way to look at it: Sometimes a game is easier to enjoy when you don’t have anything on the line. And if the Pats win, then New England Defensive Coordinator Romeo Crennel (pictured) will be that much more of a score if, in…
Tranny Talk
Tranny Talk Courage comes in many forms: I just read the article about one of your most courageous citizens: Mr. Jimmie Lee Smith [“Salem Witch Hunt,” January 19]. Here in Florida, stories about personal integrity and victory over discrimination are few and far between. I don’t understand transgender issues very well at all; yet, all…
On View
NEW From Leipzig — The seven young artists here are all representational painters associated with the Leipzig Academy of Visual Arts, yet there is tremendous variety among the show’s seven paintings, covering a wide palette of styles and subjects. Martin Kobe and David Schnell are fascinated with perspective: In Schnell’s acrylic, “Stangen im Mai,” a…
Nipple Party
Why a Nipple Party? “Because everybody’s got two,” says host Xela, one of the few masters-of-ceremony who could assemble such an eclectic happening. A multimedia festival of rock and art, this double-decker bash spills over both floors of the Grog Shop. Xela’s 3io rock band headlines an upstairs rock show with jam band Caribou Foot…
Stoned Talent
There’s not much work for high school sophomores who’ve mastered the fine art of shaping animals from balloons. So Jared Markowitz, a magician-actor from Orange High School, figured Stone Model & Talent Agency might be the ticket. Stone offered to help him find auditions for television and film work. All he had to do was…
Here’s the Deal
“Value” is a buzzword with us habitual restaurant-goers, but what exactly does it mean? For starters, let’s dispense with the notion that it equals “cheap.” A super-sized burger and a liter of cola consumed in a moving vehicle may be cheap, but it’s not value. Likewise, an all-you-can-eat buffet, stocked with gloppy casseroles and lukewarm…
Do or Die
Now we get to see whether Kanye West’s Midas touch of 2004 has carried over into the new year. So far, on his first major assignment of ’05 — helping out fellow Chi-town natives Do or Die — the answer is yes. West produced only a couple of ace tracks on D.O.D. , including the…
Concrete Walls
As Alan recalls the night of August 8, 2003, he clenches his teacup; his knuckles turn white. Curled up in an easy chair in his mother’s Cuyahoga Falls apartment, he pauses. “I’m sorry,” he says as he breaks from his story. “Talking about it dredges up a lot of feelings I’ve tried to put behind…
Best of the Dead
If the big brains at America Online’s City Guide can be trusted, finding a fresh meal in Cleveland may be harder than ever these days. The website revealed the winners of its annual “City’s Best” restaurant survey on January 20, and the results were oddly mixed: Many of the top spots no longer exist –…
Unwritten Law
Before Unwritten Law became the inoffensive rockers seen on television, shilling for such things as MTV’s real-life documentary My Super Sweet 16, the SoCal group cranked out tunes sanitized for skatepunk poseurs stuck in the suburbs and wearing black nail polish in protest. One would be hard-pressed to find any residue from those days on…
Don’t Call It a Comeback
Give Paula Poundstone a break. So she spent six months in detox after her “horrible debacle” four years ago. And so what, if she doesn’t take her stand-up act to every comedy club in every city, every year? That doesn’t mean she’s fallen off the face of the earth. “A photographer said to me recently…
Highway to Hell
Dennis A. Bell drives people to drink. Perhaps only mother-in-laws, taxmen, and the Tribe’s bullpen inspire more boozing in Cleveland than the founder of the roof-raising Lords of the Highway. “When we play, we always have a very high ratio of beer and liquor being bought,” the singer-guitarist chuckles. “Every once in a while, instead…
Lou Barlow
Melancholia is a tricky thing. It can be stultifying — or endearing in a bittersweet, quietly empathetic manner. Some folks do melancholy better than others: Frank Sinatra for one (what, you’ve never heard Sings for Only the Lonely?), Lou Barlow for another. For the most part, this former member of Dinosaur Jr., Sebadoh, and Folk…
This Week’s Day-By-Day Picks
Thursday, February 3 The Other Theater Project is about more than a bunch of stuffy thespians reciting lines onstage. For its second production, Adaptation (which opens tonight), the troupe has lined up a new comedy sketch and a Let’s Make a Deal-like contest, complete with prizes! At the center of it is Elaine May’s one-act…
No Longer Lost
Serious music dweebs will find Lost in the Grooves: Scram’s Capricious Guide to the Music You Missed to be their vinyl-collecting bible. Those guaranteed to spazz out include the lisping, indie-rock obsessive who gets teary-eyed at Belle & Sebastian concerts, the Steve Buscemi character in the movie Ghost World, and the droning, Kermit the Frog-voiced…
Sasha & John Digweed
Through the early ’90s, the U.K. witnessed the dual explosion of Britpop and club music, carefree and drug-fueled. And the Renaissance label, which picked up the pieces after the legendary Hacienda dance club shut its doors, was at the epicenter of it all. Under its bacchanalian banner, two soon-to-be iconic DJs were staking their claim…
About a Boy
Once you’ve seen the picture of Emmett Till’s battered, bloated face, it’s hard to forget it. Lying there in his coffin, he looks about his age — 14 — but his childlike features have been transformed into a mass of disfiguring bruises and shattered bone. Till was a black kid from Chicago, visiting relatives in…
Decade of Decadence
Bowling for Soup’s breakthrough hit “1985” may make mention of Madonna, Bruce Springsteen, U2, and Blondie, but the song is really about the undying appeal of ’80s poodle metal. Its protagonist is a desperate housewife named Debbie, who daydreams about shaking her ass on the hood of David Coverdale’s ‘Vette. In the “1985” video, she…
Various Artists
To be taken under the wing of Nic Harcourt, the mastermind behind the taste-making L.A. public-radio show Morning Becomes Eclectic, you need do one of three things: 1) Write gently melodic songs about moral uplift and the triumph of the human spirit. 2) Fold into your music mild hints of international exotica. 3) Espouse good-natured…
Season’s Beatings
SUN 2/6 Josh Prohibition, cruiserweight champion of Cleveland All-Pro Wrestling, has a prediction for his first meeting with Alex Shelley, visiting star of Total Nonstop Action-National Wrestling Alliance at Sunday’s St. Valentine’s Mat Massacre: deep hurting. “I will retain the title,” boasts Prohibition, a 6-foot 200-pounder (pictured). “I guarantee it. I’ll dump him on his…
King Solomon
D-Mite just got faded like a haircut. After suffering the indignity of being dubbed the hip-hop Harry Potter, the bespectacled white boy in the Bill Cosby sweater is spared no ridicule. “Look at this fuckin’ sad-faced clown,” booms Tut, a Redwood-sized rapper with a voice deeper than Lake Erie, eyeing the baby-faced MC. “Blow-up dolls…
Roger Hoover and the Whiskeyhounds
As a solo performer and leader of the Whiskeyhounds, Roger Hoover regularly holds court in his hometown of Akron, though he sounds as if he grew up in a backwoods Tennessee family that worshiped at a racially diverse gospel church. Panic Blues, the Whiskeyhounds’ second album, opens with “Keep Me Away From You,” country blues…
Uptown Boy
2/8-2/20 Of the dozens of cities on Movin’ Out’s national tour, only one — Cleveland — caught the eye of Michael Cavanaugh, the Tony-nominated singer from the Broadway run of Twyla Tharp and Billy Joel’s musical. A native of Middleburg Heights, Cavanaugh agreed to meet up with the company when it comes to town and…
Bloody Knuckles III
After a promising first year and disappointing second year at the Odeon, Canadian heavy-metal magazine Brave Words and Bloody Knuckles planned not to hold a third annual Six-Pack Weekend metal festival in 2005, but the festival will return to the Flats club Thursday, May 5, through Saturday, May 7, with a smaller, stronger bill of…
Mike St. Jude and the Valentines
Mike St. Jude’s voice is as pretty and capricious as the women he chases throughout his latest full-length. On Hoodshot Blues, Jude navigates sanguine folk and pop with a pliant lilt, capable of conveying innocence even when he sings about getting shitfaced. None of this is to suggest that St. Jude’s tunes are all starry-eyed…
Dogged Detectives
2/4-2/6 Though he’s the only human being in a cast of animated pals, Jacob Kramer is still clueless over what Blue wants for her birthday. As Joe in the touring production of Blue’s Clues Live! Blue’s Birthday Party, Kramer invites his preschool audience to join Magenta the dog, Periwinkle the cat, and the rest of…
Jim Suhler & Monkey Beat
It’s not as if the state of Texas didn’t already have more than its fair share of hotshot blues-rock guitarists. Maybe it’s the water. Maybe it’s just the overabundance of home-state legends like Johnny Winter, Billy Gibbons, and those Vaughan kids that spurs the young’uns on. Whatever the reason, add Jim Suhler to the list…
Byrne, Hollywood, Byrne
2/2-2/6 Like many of his peers, funnyman Steve Byrne got his start in the comedy clubs. Unlike many of them, however, Byrne wasn’t onstage; he answered phones and swept floors. Since then, he has appeared on most of the B-list late-night chat shows (Kimmel, Kilborn, and Colin Quinn), has opened for Mariah Carey, and was…
Ska Is Dead 2
In 1998, Toasters singer Bucket Hingley said that “the people who are telling me ska is dead never knew it was alive.” Cute quote, but ska faces bigger problems now. Today’s radio listeners don’t even know ska well enough to identify its corpse at the music morgue. A decade ago, No Doubt and Goldfinger introduced…
Secrets and Lies
How does Mike Leigh do it? The years pass, film fashions come and go, Hollywood churns its commercial pap. Careers sparkle, others fizz; whom the gods would destroy, they first make famous. Meanwhile, over in England, Leigh makes his films, tracking the intricacies of the lower-class family with the patience of a man cutting diamonds.…
Donavon Frankenreiter
Donavon Frankenreiter’s in an enviable position. Though he’s not exactly the best-known or most-hyped singer-songwriter on the circuit, his surf-mafia friends Jack Johnson and G. Love both show up on his self-titled debut. Frankenreiter’s music echoes the laid-back vibe of the surf lifestyle in reggae-ish, three-chord sing-alongs abetted by harmonicas, Hammonds, and happiness — the…
Hide and Suck
If you can make it past the first 10 minutes or so of Hide and Seek without busting up laughing, chances are that you’ve never seen a horror movie before in your life. This hack job of a “thriller” may steal from the best, but it does it so badly and obviously that it has…
Silvertide
Old habits die hard in blue-collar northeast Philadelphia and its outlying suburbs. Rimless Iroc-Zs up on blocks still dot the landscape, and there’s no shortage of mullets and acid-washed denim parading through JCPenney on Saturday afternoons. Musically speaking, the locals have little tolerance for progressive trance or indie-noise-punk or ninth-wave ska or whatever — they…
The Hustle
PARK CITY, UTAH — John Singleton, director of Boyz n the Hood, was all warm grins at the frigid outdoor party on January 22, and with good reason. Hustle & Flow, a movie he produced for 33-year-old writer-director Craig Brewer, was in the process of being sold for $9.5 million to Paramount Pictures, which will…
WJCU Metal Monday Night Out
If longhairs ever feel any slight pangs of remorse about getting Nick Nolte-style drunk and supporting the devil’s music, WJCU’s Metal Monday Night Out should soothe a few consciences — if not eardrums. With a tougher-than-leather lineup boasting such drunk and/or demonic local rippers as Amps II Eleven and Black Trinity, the concert is all…
Cutting the Chords
Chances are, you’d prefer that certain parts of your family history disappear forever. Some memories are frivolous, of course, and pretty easy to delete from memory — Dad teaching your first date how to make armpit farts, for example. But there are other legacies handed down from one generation to the next that defy glib…
Mudvayne
Painted like DayGlo demons, the members of Mudvayne once boasted such rock monikers as Kud and Spüg. They’ve since lost the makeup and changed their metal names to the Brady-style Chad, Greg, Ryan, and Matt. The video for the power ballad “World So Cold” saw them making serious faces into the camera while sporting goatees…
