I admit I flashed a Vulcan “live long and prosper” sign to the assembly at my graduation. I’ve looked up Gene Roddenberry’s lyrics to the Alexander Courage classic Star Trek TV theme song. And I’ve spent the decades since mostly jobless and dateless. Guess you could call me a hardcore fan.
So trust me when I say that J. J. Abrams’ much-anticipated
remake/reboot/prequel/sequel to Paramount’s Star Trek series is
not your father’s Star Trek — not by light years. It’s
more like your snotty little iPod-plugged nephew’s. That’s not to say
that the feature isn’t great fun, tight as a drum in its action and no
disgrace to the legacy of the phenomenal pop-culture franchise.
In the 23rd century, Starfleet up-and-comer George Kirk is killed
with his ship when a time-space warp materializes a gang of nasty,
vengeful Romulans from 127 years in the future, piloting their own
enormous Death Star (more like a Death Squid, given the production
design). George’s wife gives birth to a nervy punk named James T. Kirk
(Chris Pine), who grows up a motorcycle delinquent around the
space-shipyards of Iowa. Meanwhile on Vulcan, planet of serene logic
and repressed emotion, the persecuted half-human prodigy Spock (Zachary
Quinto) grows up with a mild anger-management problem.
Most of the fun is in the first-time reunion of these iconic
characters. Pine’s cocky Brat-Pack Kirk is less like William Shatner
and more like Jim Carrey’s comical impression. Quinto nails Spock. It’s
a good thing this is so entertaining, because the eventual return to
deep-space naval battle with the Romulan Death Squid (the villains just
conveniently disappear from the narrative for a quarter-century) is
hardly stuff Where No One Has Gone Before — the unenthralling
baddies seem recycled from 2002’s disappointing Nemesis. But
then again, one suspects the target audience here is too young to
remember that far back anyhow.
Abrams is a slick, smart filmmaker who writes into his Star
Trek an ingenious escape mechanism for nitpickers to explain the
movie’s inconsistencies. It is perhaps a “spoiler warning” to say that
parallel universes and messed-up timelines are key not only to the
scenario, but to the shift in overall narrative tone. No stuffy Prime
Directive; Abrams’ trek warps from the formal duty-bound Federation
invented by Gene Roddenberry to a wilder and more uninhibited version
for the YouTube/Jackass generation. Don’t be surprised if,
in future sequels, Mr. Spock has a beard and a nasty ‘tude, and Uhura
is sporting a bare midriff.
This article appears in May 6-12, 2009.
I think I’d die if I saw Spock with “a beard and a nasty ‘tude,” but I’d just be on the long list of casualties from seeing Spock do something very unSpock like ~twice~ in this movie. XD
And no, I’m not talking about kicking ass.
It was a great movie, 4 stars, 8 outta 10. Brilliant character development of the original bromance, great CGI and quirky characters. Yeah, the villain is weaksauce, but I don’t care. I’m a bit too busy falling in love with Chekov, fangirling over Kirk and Spock and mourning the Vulcans.
THIS was a great pilot. Movies or series, or both. Whatever they do next has a strong foundation to build on. (Klingons next, for the love of GOD, Klingons next!)