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Happy birthday, Cleveland.

On this day in 1796, General Moses Cleaveland, one of the founders of the Connecticut Land Company, arrived at the mouth of the Cuyahoga River, took a look around at the beauty and wonder around him, and said, “This would be a fine, fine place for a city. Well, it’s not a horrible place for a city. I’d give it a 50-50 shot at surviving. Whatever.” Then he immediately issued the first “No swimming because of dangerous bacteria” warning at Edgewater in the city’s history. That is the true story of Cleveland’s founding on July 22, 1796.

215 years later, here we are, suddenly overshadowed in birthday pomp and circumstance by Selena Gomez, who was also born this day, but still around and kicking.

While you’re having a polish boy and some Paramount vodka to celebrate (215th birthdays are tradionally spent drinking indoors and planning for Bone Thugs concerts), here’s a brief if incomplete timeline of Cleveland’s early and undocumented history on this, the most important day in the history of Rust Belt days.

This article appears in Jul 20-26, 2011.

Vince Grzegorek has been with Scene since 2007 and editor-in-chief since 2012. He previously worked at Discount Drug Mart and Texas Roadhouse.

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