December 29, 2017

The 25 Most WTF Cleveland Stories of 2017

Looking back on the year that was 2017 leaves us laughing and crying and nostalgic and also ready to move on to 2018. But before we move on, we thought we needed to take a look back at the strangest and craziest stories from the year that was. There was no shortage of odd and bizarre Northeast Ohio stories from 2017. In fact, this is our second slideshow covering this topic this year. Happy New Year to all and here's to all the weird stories we know are coming to Northeast Ohio in 2018.

Looking back on the year that was 2017 leaves us laughing and crying. But before we move on, we thought we needed to take a look back at the strangest and craziest stories from the year that was. There was no shortage of odd and bizarre Northeast Ohio stories from 2017. In fact, this is our second slideshow covering this topic this year. Happy New Year to all and here's to all the weird stories we know are coming our way in 2018.

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 “Why One University of Akron Student Longboards Around Campus Dressed Like Jesus”
Feb. 22
If you’ve ever spotted a Christ-like figure longboarding around the University of Akron, you (probably) weren’t hallucinating. Chances are it was Joe Gerin, or “Longboard Jesus,” who put his skateboarding skills and distinctive facial hair to good use earlier this year.
Photo via @JMGerin/Instagram

“Why One University of Akron Student Longboards Around Campus Dressed Like Jesus”

Feb. 22

If you’ve ever spotted a Christ-like figure longboarding around the University of Akron, you (probably) weren’t hallucinating. Chances are it was Joe Gerin, or “Longboard Jesus,” who put his skateboarding skills and distinctive facial hair to good use earlier this year.

Photo via @JMGerin/Instagram
 “Sandusky Couple Charged After Staging Fake Murder Scene With Ketchup, Spreading Photos”
March 10
A Sandusky couple thought it would be funny to stage a murder. The woman went into the bathtub, where her significant other covered her with ketchup, and the male then sent the photos to family and friends to show that he murdered her. Whoever they sent the pictures to didn’t find it funny; they called the police, who came to the couple’s house and charged them with inducing panic.
Photo via Wikipedia

“Sandusky Couple Charged After Staging Fake Murder Scene With Ketchup, Spreading Photos”

March 10

A Sandusky couple thought it would be funny to stage a murder. The woman went into the bathtub, where her significant other covered her with ketchup, and the male then sent the photos to family and friends to show that he murdered her. Whoever they sent the pictures to didn’t find it funny; they called the police, who came to the couple’s house and charged them with inducing panic.

Photo via Wikipedia
 “This Ohio Love Bird Didn't Quite Think Through His Spray-Painted Marriage Proposal
”
March 30
Kyle Stump of Sheffield Lake wanted to be romantic in his marriage proposal and spray painted a message to his girlfriend Michelle, asking to marry him. Unfortunately for Stump, graffiti is against the law and police quickly figured out that Stump was behind the message, as he had gotten in trouble for spray painting in red in the past. He was sentenced to community service but Michelle did say ‘yes’ to the proposal.
Photo via Sheffield Lake Police Department

“This Ohio Love Bird Didn't Quite Think Through His Spray-Painted Marriage Proposal ”

March 30

Kyle Stump of Sheffield Lake wanted to be romantic in his marriage proposal and spray painted a message to his girlfriend Michelle, asking to marry him. Unfortunately for Stump, graffiti is against the law and police quickly figured out that Stump was behind the message, as he had gotten in trouble for spray painting in red in the past. He was sentenced to community service but Michelle did say ‘yes’ to the proposal.

Photo via Sheffield Lake Police Department
 “Ohio Man Who Epically Botched 'Wheel of Fortune' Answer Earns Second Chance On 'Ellen”
April 4
Kevin Haas, a Brunswick-native, appeared on the television game show "Wheel of Fortune." Unfortunately, for Haas, he missed an absolute gimme, and was then roasted on the internet. Haas had to fill in "A Street Car Na_ed Desire," and guessed the letter ‘k’ for ‘A Street Car Naked Desire,’ instead of ‘m’, for the correct answer. Luckily for Haas, Ellen Degeneres invited him on her show to get some redemption for his epic gaffe.
Photo via Scene Archives

“Ohio Man Who Epically Botched 'Wheel of Fortune' Answer Earns Second Chance On 'Ellen”

April 4

Kevin Haas, a Brunswick-native, appeared on the television game show "Wheel of Fortune." Unfortunately, for Haas, he missed an absolute gimme, and was then roasted on the internet. Haas had to fill in "A Street Car Na_ed Desire," and guessed the letter ‘k’ for ‘A Street Car Naked Desire,’ instead of ‘m’, for the correct answer. Luckily for Haas, Ellen Degeneres invited him on her show to get some redemption for his epic gaffe.

Photo via Scene Archives
 “There's an Instagram Account Devoted to Piss Jugs in Akron”
April 27
The next time you see a water bottle, soda can or jug of piss on the side of the road, you know where to submit a photo. While this account is a departure from typical Instagram fare of FitTea and sugary hair vitamins, they’ve amassed over 600 followers. As the account's owner told Scene, “we all need hobbies.”
Photo via @AkronTruckerBombs/Instagram

“There's an Instagram Account Devoted to Piss Jugs in Akron”

April 27

The next time you see a water bottle, soda can or jug of piss on the side of the road, you know where to submit a photo. While this account is a departure from typical Instagram fare of FitTea and sugary hair vitamins, they’ve amassed over 600 followers. As the account's owner told Scene, “we all need hobbies.”

Photo via @AkronTruckerBombs/Instagram
 “Matt Underwood Sang the Hot Pockets Jingle and Brought Last Night's Indians Broadcast to a Screeching Halt
”
May 3
Indians announcer Matt Underwood is known for his gaffes from time to time. When he mentioned Tribe reporter Andre Knott’s pockets, he decided it was a good time to sing the Hot Pocket theme song, which then led to a very awkward, long silence between Underwood and partner Rick Manning. 
Photo via Wikimedia

“Matt Underwood Sang the Hot Pockets Jingle and Brought Last Night's Indians Broadcast to a Screeching Halt ”

May 3

Indians announcer Matt Underwood is known for his gaffes from time to time. When he mentioned Tribe reporter Andre Knott’s pockets, he decided it was a good time to sing the Hot Pocket theme song, which then led to a very awkward, long silence between Underwood and partner Rick Manning.

Photo via Wikimedia
 “'Jesus' Invaded Home, Prayed with Man, Stole Golf Cart, Asked to Fornicate with Police: This May Be Greatest Criminal Narrative of All Time”
May 4
According to Wayne County Captain Douglas Hunter, a man who called himself "Jesus" invaded a home, discharged a fire extinguisher, laid down at the foot of the residents' bed and then prayed for a short time with the man of the house before exiting "into the darkness." When picked up by local deputies on a golf cart, "Jesus" stated that he wanted to fornicate with the officers, but, per Hunter, "the officers just weren't interested in having that type of relationship with the man."
Photo via Wayne County Sheriff

“'Jesus' Invaded Home, Prayed with Man, Stole Golf Cart, Asked to Fornicate with Police: This May Be Greatest Criminal Narrative of All Time”

May 4

According to Wayne County Captain Douglas Hunter, a man who called himself "Jesus" invaded a home, discharged a fire extinguisher, laid down at the foot of the residents' bed and then prayed for a short time with the man of the house before exiting "into the darkness." When picked up by local deputies on a golf cart, "Jesus" stated that he wanted to fornicate with the officers, but, per Hunter, "the officers just weren't interested in having that type of relationship with the man."

Photo via Wayne County Sheriff
 “Beyonce's Dad is Doing a Book Signing Tonight at... a McDonald's in Suburban Cleveland”
May 12
Matthew Knowles, father of Beyonce, may not exactly enjoy the same level of fame as his daughter does. How do we know? When he came to Cleveland for his book signing, to autograph copies of his book, “The DNA of Achievers: 10 Traits of Highly Successful People,” the appearance took place at a McDonald’s in Maple Heights.
Photo via Scene Archives

“Beyonce's Dad is Doing a Book Signing Tonight at... a McDonald's in Suburban Cleveland”

May 12

Matthew Knowles, father of Beyonce, may not exactly enjoy the same level of fame as his daughter does. How do we know? When he came to Cleveland for his book signing, to autograph copies of his book, “The DNA of Achievers: 10 Traits of Highly Successful People,” the appearance took place at a McDonald’s in Maple Heights.

Photo via Scene Archives
 “Cleveland Took Solace in Lots of Porn After the Cavs Lost Game 5 of the NBA Finals”
June 19
When the Cavaliers lost the NBA Finals to the Golden State Warriors by a final tally of three games to one, Clevelanders took solace in pornography. How do we know? Pornhub, one of the most popular porn sites on the internet, reported that hits from the Cleveland area spiked 28 percent between the hours of midnight and 1 a.m. the night after the team lost, compared to just a 6 percent spike after the game nationwide. 
Photo via Scene Archives

“Cleveland Took Solace in Lots of Porn After the Cavs Lost Game 5 of the NBA Finals”

June 19

When the Cavaliers lost the NBA Finals to the Golden State Warriors by a final tally of three games to one, Clevelanders took solace in pornography. How do we know? Pornhub, one of the most popular porn sites on the internet, reported that hits from the Cleveland area spiked 28 percent between the hours of midnight and 1 a.m. the night after the team lost, compared to just a 6 percent spike after the game nationwide.

Photo via Scene Archives
 “88-Year-Old Ohio Man Says One-Eyed Hooker Stole His Wallet After Morning Rendezvous”
June 23
Sometimes, the headline really says it all. 
Photo via Scene Archives

“88-Year-Old Ohio Man Says One-Eyed Hooker Stole His Wallet After Morning Rendezvous”

June 23

Sometimes, the headline really says it all.

Photo via Scene Archives