Blogger Maps Out Every Strip Club (And they say bloggers aren't journalists)

Thank god for political blogs, right? I mean, how else would we discover what the candidates really stood for, what the issues are really about, and which Ohio city has the most pay-to-play boobies per capita! Yup, that's right: thanks to a self-described "female political blogger" on ProgressOhio.org, we can now declare Akron-Canton the strip club capital of Ohio. Said female blogger supposedly spent her Saturday afternoon placing every Ohio strip club on a map to determine where the highest number of lonely men and easy women take refugee. (Editor's note: Yeah, we know: She stole our idea too. Gotta remember to patent this shit). According to her handiwork, the Akron-Canton area boasts a total of 36 strip clubs, eight more than Cleveland's 28. These numbers, by the way, will likely go down if the so called Stripper Bill passes this November (fourth item). Just because Akron claims the widest offering of clubs, that doesn't mean it has the highest quality. Two words: Tallmadge Avenue. But if you're in the market for a $20 lap dance from an overweight mother of 5, then the Ak-rowdy and surrounding slums are your proper stomping grounds. -- Denise Grollmus