Redditors in San Diego and Buffalo came up with threads asking other users to share a four-word horror story about their respective cities. User anony-mouse8604 borrowed the idea, asking users to “Write a Cleveland horror story in four words.” As usual, Reddit didn’t disappoint.

These are the best responses.

Dime Beer Night 1974 Via Boxofmixedbiscuits/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Ohio city resident here. Park at the Westside Market on your night out. First 90 minutes is FREE. Every hour after that is $1. Via SlimySteve8/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Regional income tax agency Via Dodekahedroid/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
They think this photo captures an amazing moment Credit: Scene Archives
You will love the Browns Credit: Scene Archives
We’re out of beer Via schindigrosa/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Alone with Deshaun Watson Via Beneficial-Finish295/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
“This is the project that will actually redo the lakefront” Credit: Scene Archives
Don’t actually go to Lido lounge, even if it comes highly recommended. Via IllegalThings/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
The Browns should move again. Yeah, the Browns have probably been the worst franchise in all of sports since they came back in 1999, but we still love them and talk about them non-stop and they’re not going anywhere. Photo via Scene Archives Credit: Scene Archives
There’s Always Next Year Via Steviethahonkey/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
I awoke in Parma Via Jaylotw/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
You will put pierogies on your menu if you have a restaurant Credit: Scene Archives
Didn’t see that pothole Via Ktko42/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
“You’ve had the same quarterback for how long?” Photo via Scene Archives Credit: Scene Archives
Talking About the Weather It’s really cold, we get it. But tomorrow may be 70. Just wait around and see. Photo via Scene Archives Credit: Scene Archives
Game seven rain delay Via Rustbeltroots/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Cuyahoga’s on fire… again Via Minuteman_Capital/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Snow storm, no booze Via toilet-boa/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
You will spread the gospel of the Steelyard Wal-Mart, the worst in America Credit: Scene Archives
You will be forced to look at this man’s face forever Credit: Scene Archives
480 271 Split accident Via Mxassasin/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Contact Cleveland Water Department Via Dirtlikeme/Reddit Credit: Scene Archives
Torso Murderer hiatus over Via PERSON-DOES-THINKING/Reddit Credit: Creative Commons/השואה
Red Right Eighty Eight Via Lemfan46/Reddit Credit: YouTube
Jake Paul mayoral inauguration Via DomoPastromo/Reddit Credit: Erik Drost/FlickrCC