[image-1]It’s not every day, or really any day, that you get to write that headline. But today is that day, and let’s cherish it because it will probably never come again.
Police in Springfield, Ohio, relay the woeful tale of the elderly gentleman who earlier on Wednesday got the attention of some cops around 4 in the afternoon.
“Officers spoke with (the victim) who stated that a one-eyed woman stole his wallet,” the report says.
Ah, yes, the one-eyed thief story. Heard that a million times, they probably thought.
But the man continued: It was actually a one-eyed hooker that he had picked up earlier that day, around 9:30 a.m., because you gotta get the day started somehow, who was the culprit.
Turns out the woman absconded with the man’s wallet after the interlude and used his credit card over the next two hours. No arrests were made, however, despite a witness, because there was a lack of probable cause.
This article appears in Jun 21-27, 2017.
Revenge of the Slump-Buster.
That’s what you get for allowing your one-eyed cat to peep into a seafood store.
It’s not every day, or really any day, that you get to use that sentence.
But today is that day, and let’s cherish it, because it will probably never happen again.
Chuckles the Clown
Hope you get all of the clicks and shares that you wanted from exploiting sex workers and calling women hookers
How did he know she had one-eye? Was there an eye-patch involved?
Of course, I didn’t originate that line…I stole it.
Where (and when) were “one-eyed cat” and “peep into a seafood store” first heard?
Chuckles the Clown