Destination Cleveland had long struggled with its current slogan – the rather self-explanatory “This is Cleveland” – finding it only useful to people who’ve driven to Buffalo by mistake.
By contrast, the mayor’s new slogan would finally give the city an identity like no other. Officials envisioned a flood of niche tourists drawn by the butthole imagery, from colon surgeons to sodomy enthusiasts to third grade boys. They were certain Cleveland would soon vault past Elkhart, Indiana to take the coveted 112th spot in America’s Top Summer Vacation rankings.
“Once its RV Hall of Fame opened its cupholder exhibit, we thought we’d never overtake Elkhart,” says Destination Cleveland’s Sandy Bilinski. “But the butthole campaign gave us hope.”
That hope has been in short supply over the decades, as the city ran through slogan after slogan, only to be sabotaged by bad luck and unforeseen circumstances.
The city’s 1990s campaign — “Cleveland: When You Can Only Afford a Half Tank of Gas” — brought a brief surge of visitors from Massillon and Ashtabula, but it was not to last. The agency then turned to flattery with such slogans as “Cleveland: Have You Lost Weight?” and “We Like What You’ve Done With Your Hair.”
When those too failed, the city launched “We Promise to Stop Telling You About Our World Class Orchestra,” only to discover that Harrisburg had promised the same back in 2004.
Even the viral campaign “We’re Not Detroit” failed to yield sustained visitors, since no one was planning to visit Detroit anyway.
That’s left Cleveland in a do or die position with its latest “Butthole of the World” crusade. So far, it’s been an exercise in tempered enthusiasm.
Destination Cleveland hoped to lure the Association of Colonoscopy Technicians’ convention away from San Diego, arguing that its slogan, “California’s Beach City,” doesn’t offer so much as a nod to buttocks-related imagery. Yet the group had already put down a deposit.
A Cub Scout troop from Shreveport excitedly wrote en masse about visiting the globe’s butthole, only to later write back that they were “not allowed.”
“We’re not giving up on Frank’s dream,” says Bilinski. “This is a legacy builder, like the time Mayor Ralph Perk set his hair on fire. Frank deserves to be mentioned in the same breath.”
This article appears in Jun 3-9, 2020.
Welp, over the weekend in less than 8 hours a Gun Store was looted and an Amazon Warehouse was torched. Were the rioters/looters just following the Gameplan laid out by Pete Kotz’s June 2nd Article entitled “Dear America: 5 Better Places to Target Next Time You Riot”
You got the Gun Shop and Amazon, only Wells Fargo, JP Morgan and the University of Phoenix remain.
Pete, you getting knocks on your door at your home in Minnesota yet? I will push this until you’re facing federal charges you feral puke.
Pete,
Know when to say when.
It’s been bad from day one, and nothing in this attempt is providing and hope.
Best of luck
How about Cleveland: Dare to be Mediocre ?
And next up, Taxin Jackson will have his hand out yet again for another 50% income tax hike on us folks that actually have to work on this corruption-filled, dump of a city and county!!!
Cooks like Taxin Jackson, and cohort thief Budish, need to be recalled out of office NOW!!!
What I find far more amusing is that Minneapolis City Council recently announced that it is seriously considering getting rid of the Minneapolis Police Department permanently.
In 2019, Minneapolis had an estimated population of 429,606, which is larger than Cleveland’s.
Believe it or not, some actually think it will be better for a social worker to respond to public calls for help than for police to respond.
Pete Koz should have an easy time finding humorous things to say about this ridiculous proposal– especially, if Cleveland City Council decides to follow suit and permanently get rid of the Cleveland Police Department.
Pete, I hear their looking for unfunny funnymen in NYC…and SNL pays better. Time for you to get out of our hair and to hit the road to Dreamland. Maybe Mikey Day and Pete Davidson will LOL at your shtick.
OOPS…THEY”RE looking for unfunny funny men…whose lame humor blows dead donkeys.
I guess a butthole is better than a colon.
I think we are struggling with our new slogan cuz it is bland and lacks enthusiasm. You want a slogan that is catchy one that catches the attention of the people. One that says “Cleveland is the city for you”. We need a slogan like that. We need to draw more people to Cleveland because right now we are losing population.I will think of one.