Think you did proper justice to America’s birthday last week? This fella will take your American flag tank top, overcooked brat and six pack of domestic swill and raise you one scorching wheelie on the Innerbelt Bridge while shooting off fireworks at the same time.
This article appears in Jul 11-17, 2018.

Too bad he didn’t die
From a spark in his eye
I wouldn’t cry
I’d just say…BYE!