Might have to strap beer to your belly if you want booze in Elyria.

  • Might have to strap beer to your belly if you want booze in Elyria.

Booze and Cleveland go together like, well… booze and Cleveland. Or maybe Jimmy Dimora and Hometown Buffet. Either way.

There’s been a string of crime in Elyria and the city is blaming it on the bars that populate the downtown area and serve refreshing, crime-inducing alcohol to patrons. If the bars don’t shape up, and soon, there’s talk of Elyria going dry. Entries for “dry,” as it pertains to alcohol, in the thesaurus include “boring” and “stupid.”

The depressing details after the jump.

Vince Grzegorek has been with Scene since 2007 and editor-in-chief since 2012. He previously worked at Discount Drug Mart and Texas Roadhouse.