jimmy-dimora-batmobile.jpg

And who could blame him? He’s a man accustomed to steaks and hookers, bourbon and tiki huts, and prison as a whole is not the ideal abode.

Back in March, the jury handed down a cascade of guilty verdicts on the former commissioner and full-time scumbag; sentencing is scheduled for Monday down in Akron under the swift hand of justice known as Judge Lioi. Prosecutors are asking for 22 years, which seems like a light sentence given the fisting that Dimora gave the taxpayers of Cuyahoga County, but whatever — the man is 54 years-old and in declining health.

Dimora, shockingly, does not agree. His lawyers filed a 55-page rec to Judge Lioi where they argued that a) What Dimora did to taxpayers was more of a light tickle, not so much a fiscal screwjob; and b) the fact that he’s 54 and not healthy merits a shorter sentence. Because everything in Dimora’s life is negotiable. Like how much this vote costs over here for this guy over there, and how many slices of pepperoni he can get on that pizza.

Via the PD:

“His actions have not led to losses of money or benefit to the people of Cuyahoga County,” Whitaker wrote in his sentencing recommendation.

Oh, Jimmy.

We wouldn’t expect anything to come of it, and it’s perfectly predictable for Big Jimmy to argue this to the end, but that end is coming in just a few days, and it ain’t gonna be no free trip to Vegas.

This article appears in Jul 18-24, 2012.

Vince Grzegorek has been with Scene since 2007 and editor-in-chief since 2012. He previously worked at Discount Drug Mart and Texas Roadhouse.

5 replies on “Jimmy Dimora Doesn’t Want to Go to Prison for 22 Years”

  1. Too bad Jimmy!!! If you’re looking for sympathy, you’re going to have to move to Jupiter to get it. You spent millions of our taxpayer dollars on pure pleasure and illicit sex. Now its time for you to pay for your dishonesty, your cheating, and most importantly, your taking of our hard earned tax dollars. I HOPE YOU ROT IN JAIL FOR THE REST OF YOUR PORKY, CHEATING, GREEDY LIFE!!!!!!!

  2. he’s not going to be giving up that much, he can get jail-house hootch tube steak all while sitting on his stainless steel throne??

  3. “His actions have not led to losses of money or benefit to the people of Cuyahoga County,” Whitaker wrote in his sentencing recommendation.

    Are you FREAKING kidding me? Seriously? That’s an actual argument…WOW.

    So maybe I’m a little bitter about Fatty Fat Jimmy D drilling this city in the ass, but I have absolutely no sympathy for him at all. He is in poor health now? Well karma is a bitch, now isn’t it? How ironic that his current health is a perfect reflection of the current health of the city of Cleveland thanks to his great “leadership” skills. I want him to rot in jail for the rest of his life if I have anything to say about it.

    Another perfect example of why you should think things through before doing stupid stuff. Hey, maybe before drilling an entire city in the ass, think about the fact that the city will eventually find out and most likely won’t be too happy about it. You enjoy the cushy lifestyle for years and years, but then cry about the prospect of spending hopefully the rest of your life behind bars? Screw you, asshole. I’m going to buy a cake and drink a bottle of your tears once they hand out your official sentence, and it damn well better be a sentence that spans for the rest of your stupid, greedy, stealing, asshole life.

    You’re a piece of garbage Dimora, and I can’t tell you how happy I am that you’re getting everything you deserve. Enjoy jail. I doubt there will be any strippers in there for you to eat jelly doughnuts off of.

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