The teenage years are a time meant for personal experimentation. Tastes and preference, comfort levels and inclinations, all of it should get worked out in that headlong hormonal rush toward adulthood. Got to learn how to do you.
If that means messing around with some sex toys, by all means, go for the gold. Only, you should probably fork over your own dime rather than pinch the items from a store. If a security guard makes you unzip your backpack and haul out some 8-inch Sinforia in the middle of a crowded mall, all your Freudian nuts and bolts might get twisted up for years to come.
That might be the case down at Summit Mall, where an 18-year-old was just nabbed at a Spencer Gifts. Via Patch:
Security watched the teen grab a sex toy, open the box, put the item into a backpack and walk out the of store, the report said. He came back a store time later, grabbed another of the same item, opened it and put it in his backpack as well.
Security stopped the teen on his way out this time and retrieved the items. They were valued at $34 and police charged the teen with theft.
This article appears in Jul 4-10, 2012.
Now that’s a record to begin a career. ‘Well, he started off stealing dildos at 18 and then started to steal blow-ups with orifi and then he went for sex robots…He married a sheep so that the bio requirement could be met, but still loved rubber and plastic more.
Then after a long life of seclusion: Old man found dead in shack in the woods with fucking machine gone hay-wire. Old man left a one word note: Plastics.
if that kid isn’t careful he will end up in prison and experiance sex he’s not going to enjoy, (“MAYBE”). to each their own.
Before dildos they had vegetables and fruit. The serpent in the Garden was said to be the devil and a crank-symbol, which is what we still see as the closest personifiction of the crank. I hate the word penis. I is an onamonapia or some thing. The crank has more names than any other thing in life and has so many different personalities. And then there are the confusious crank poetic statements like: a hard dick ain’t got no conscience.
We call people crank-names and say that they do bad things with cranks. We hate men who act like a hard crank and we act like a harder crank when we compete. It is bad to force crank like Anthony Sowell and Jerry Sandusky do. Forcing crank can get you killed easier than murder and often more hard time. When a guy gets hard time for forcing hard crank, he is most likely to be a giver and a receiver of forced crank attacks. He may as well get used to what most would think of as hell. Prison is not a place for someone who forced crank as their crime. Like Jerry Sandusky will not like the new shower arrangements much.
This just in: Another forced crank attack on the west side of Cleveland. Man being pulled out of another human still pulsating. Crank very mad at all suspected 98.6 orifi in vicinity. Man claims he popped too many boner-beans and went insane and was controled by purple-helmeted warrior.
For punishment, officers beat the teen with said stolen dildos for a span of thirty minutes. The teen reportedly enjoyed the experience and plans to be a repeat offender.